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Team USA Outlasted The International Team And Won Their 6th Presidents Cup In A Row

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And we’re back!  With coverage of the Presidents Cup that nobody asked for but it just so happens that I have no life and watched every bit of it despite it being in South Korea and airing at weird hours over the weekend. My sad and pathetic social life aside, the 11th installment of the Ryder Cup’s Little Brother AKA The Presidents Cup finished up last night with the Americans beating the International Team by a score of 15.5 to 14.5. It was Team USA’s 6th PC win in a row and, like I’ve been saying all week, that’s the main problem with this tournament.  The Americans always win so there’s very little drama but you know what?  There actually was drama this year!  I honestly might’ve flipped on this whole Presidents Cup. Last night if you were able to forget for a few hours that you were watching a poor man’s Ryder Cup then it was actually a hell of a lot of fun. I thought for sure USA was gonna win in a blow out after going up 4-1 after Day 1 but the tournament wasn’t decided until the very last singles match on the very last day. It was kinda amazing.

 

Here’s how the final day shook out. Day 4 is singles matches

 

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A couple quick notes on the matches:

 

– I don’t know what the hell happened to Rickie Fowler but he got TROUNCED by Adam Scott in singles. Part of me blames whatever company made the team apparel for the Presidents Cup.  Can a brother get a flat brim hat?  These guys are all creatures of habit.

 

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– Iowan Zach Johnson beat Jason Day straight up.  Head-to-head. Zach beat a guy who was the hottest golfer on the planet for the second part of the summer. A hot streak the likes we haven’t seen since a guy named Tiger Woods in 2000. Zach beat that guy. Pretty cool.

 

– I know I hate on Bubba a lot but I want you to know that every single bit of it is warranted. Every shred of hatred I toss Bubba’s way is justified.  This Presidents Cup was no different.  Let’s flash back to Day 3.  Alternate shot. 18th green.  Bubba has a three-footer to win the hole and gain a full point for the Americans

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He of course fumble fucks it away.  Chokes on a three-footer and Team USA only gets half a point. And then in true Bubba style he rips into his caddy Ted Scott who is going to murder Bubba in his sleep one of these days.

 

Now let’s go to yesterday.  Singles match vs Thongchai Jaidee. 18th green. Same situation. Bubba has a putt to win a full point for the Americans and, at that point in the tournament, really put the Internatinal Team behind the 8 ball

 

 

 

He missed AGAIN.  Another big ol’ dump in his pants and another half point for the Americans when it should’ve been a full point. Fucking Bubba. Who knows. If Bubba tears it up for Team USA, talks shit to the International Team and bashes in some skulls maybe I start to like the guy.  Nope. Same guy.  Same hate.

 

– Quick shout out to Phil Mickelson. Lots of people didn’t even think he deserved to be on the Presidents Cup team and he turned out to be the lightning rod of the squad. Not only did he dominate Charl Schwartzel in his singles match but he talked shit throughout the week and holed amazing bunker shots. There’s a reason Lefty has been a part of every team competition ever.

 

– Chris Kirk vs Anirban Lahiri. Not eactly a huge match up in terms of star power but it had one of the best/worst moments of the Presidents Cup. The type of heartbreaking/awesome moment that tournaments like this need.

 

Let’s set the scene. The match was all square through 17. This was near the end where points and half points were CRUCIAL. Kirk set himself up for a tough 15-foot putt while Lahiri left himself with about a 4-footer.

 

Here’s Kirk’s putt on 18. At this point he’s just hoping he makes it so he can halve the whole and get half a point for the Americans

 

 

 

 

 

NAILS IT. Big ol balls dragging all the way across the green and into the cup.  Rare emotion for Chris Kirk. Big moment.  Big putt.  Again though, he’s thinking he made that to halve the hole with Lahiri.

 

Here’s Lahiri’s putt on 18 to halve the hole

 

 

So good!  So good!  So good!  Choke city population Anirban Lahiri!  It was so fantastic.  He pulled a Bubba!  Shit just sprinting down his leg.  Those are exactly the type of moments the Presidents Cup needs.  Utter heartbreak for one side and complete jubilation for the other side.

 

LOL

 

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– The last singles match of the day was Presidents Cup captain’s son Bill Haas vs Sangmoon Bae.  BIG time match up which I’m sure got big time TV ratings. Decent story lines though. Haas playing to win the tournament for his Dad and Sangmoon Bae is being forced to enter the Korean military for two years after this tournament (that’s a real thing).  This match had an equally(and probably more so) heartbreaking moment for the International Team.

 

Haas was 1 up on Bae through 17 with the team scores at 14.5 and 14.5. So Team USA was guaranteed at least a tie (in that case nothing would happen. Just a tie so that would’ve SUCKED).  Bae had to win the hole in order for the International Team to share the Presidents Cup with the US.

 

Haas put his approach shot into a green side bunker. Bae put his approach shot left of the green where people had been all day.  So Bae had a chance if he could chip it close, or by some miracle, chip it in.

 

Here’s what happened

 

 

 

He CHUNKS it.  Bad. And that’s how Sangmoon Bae’s last shot for two years goes down. Haas chipped it close from the bunker and Bae conceded his putt. USA wins the Presidents Cup.  Bae will now stay in Korea and enter the military for a mandatory two years. How crazy is that?  That sucks so bad. He now has a full two years to think about how he pooped his pants at the Presidents Cup in front of his countrymen. Brutal.  But hey, U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

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So there you have it.  Team USA holds on and wins the Presidents Cup for the 6th time in a row (9th overall).  USA gonna USA.  We’re the best for a reason.

 

Oh and before we end this here are some of the celebrations.  Not near enough champagne showers IMO.  Needed a white t-shirt -wearing Paulina Gretzky getting hosed down by DJ with a bottle of Cook’s.  Alas.

 

Bubba being a fucking weirdo

 

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On second thought, that hat looks just fine on Rickie

 

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I don’t know what’s happening here

 

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Father/son moment between Bill and Jay Haas. Between Bill winning the Presidents Cup for his Dad and Bieber’s Dad complimenting his son’s dick size it was a big week for fathers and sons.

 

 

 

 

Fuck it, we doing Presidents Cup tears?  Let’s do Presidents Cup tears

 

 

 

(this was way longer than I anticipated it being. Sorry about that. Happy Sunday!)