Father's Day Collection | T-Shirts, Hats, Polos, Crewnecks, Q-Zips and MoreSHOP NOW

Advertisement

No Biggie, Just That Maneating Bear Who Walks Like A Human Is Back Strutting Around Suburban New Jersey

From last year:

I still refuse to believe this is a real bear casually strutting his shit down the cul-de-sac in suburban Jersey. Hey Jimmy Kimmel, get out of the suit and start back up The Man Show while you’re at it. I miss that program a lot more than any man should. Tony Soprano should get his shotgun, shoot for the leg and we’ll see if this fucker runs on all fours or goes directly into the fetal position like LeBron after getting sideswiped by a stiff breeze. Isn’t it bow season, too? Robin Hood that shit. Aim small, miss small.

Still though, gotta proceed with caution whether it’s the real thing or not. When the sign says don’t feed the bears, man you better not feed those bears. That goes for playing with the little, cute cubs, too. You never know when mama bear is around the corner ready to mess up your entire existence. Or deservingly roughs up some bitch’s kayak. Well played again, young Yogi.