I Have Never Seen A PeeWee Football Player Get Bitched Around This Badly

Hey man, maybe time to hang ‘em up. You’ve already suffered more embarrassment in your career than many do in a lifetime. Perhaps try soccer? Cross country? Hell, field hockey? But football is not your game. If I had to give you a scout grade right now it’s an F.


Harnessing energy: F

Looking like an infant and flailing on the field: A

Speed: C+

Breakdown: Z


Add all that up and I’m pretty sure that’s Luis Mendoza, so you’d definitely be a great soccer player. Or even hockey if you can find an old man to make soda can pyramids for you.