It's Time To Acknowledge That There Is A Very Real Possibility The Celtics Have Discovered The Ability To Time Travel
Maddie Meyer. Getty Images.Here's the thing you always have to remember about the Boston Celtics. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY loves to troll more than them. I actually think in some sick and twisted way, they get something out of continuously making all of us who watch them feel every human emotion possible over the course of 2.4 hours.
I've said it for years and I'll say it again here. No team on the planet can look completely dominant, a true unstoppable force, while also looking like a team that has never played the sport of basketball before, all in the confines of a single game. I dare you to find any other team in the NBA that does this. I'm talking about a team that can hit the highest of highs of the sport of basketball and then the lowest of lows all in the same 4 quarters. And then not only do they do that, they do it consistently.
Am I happy that the Celts narrowly avoided yet another disaster collapse and horrific loss? I don't know if I would use the word happy. Relieved? Annoyed? Kind of embarrassed? That's closer to the bone if we're being honest.
I get it. Teams go on runs, a 20 point lead in 2026 may as well be a 4 point lead given the pace and three point shooting. They say no lead is truly safe in today's NBA and speaking from personal experience, I can see why. The second you let your foot off the gas or take things down a notch with a big lead, you're just asking the Basketball Gods to fuck you. That could be the Celts, that could be any team.
In a game without Jayson Tatum who was sitting with rest, I think most of us looked at this game against the lowly Bucks as a nice bounce-back opportunity to respond following the tough B2B loss against the Rockets. Ha, aren't we dumb. Of course that's how it looked at times, with the Celts getting off to a good start and building a 21 point lead in the break.
By the end of it? We were all fighting for our lives. We were staring yet ANOTHER horrific collapse right in the face, only this one in my opinion would have been 100000000x worse given where the game was being played and who it was being played against. This isn't like falling to the Pistons who are good on their floor while playing at a weird time. This was at home, against arguably one of the worst teams in the league.
Thankfully, they punched back late and held on, avoiding disaster. In some ways, a win is a win is a win. While others will probably treat this as a loss, screw those people. This is the NBA. Anything can happen on any given night if you don't execute, and that includes potentially suffering one of the more embarrassing losses of the young season.
It wasn't always pretty, it took years off our life which really shouldn't be happening against dogshit teams in early November, but such is life. At least they held on, so let's talk about it.
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The Good
- As a society, we've been led to believe that time travel is not possible. That it's something that only exists in fiction. That unless you're Tony Stark or some shit, nobody has figured out how to do it.
Wrong. And I can prove it.
With Jayson Tatum on the sidelines, it shifted the role of Paul George. For this one, he was tasked with no longer being the supportive #2, and instead being the #1 guy. The singular star who could carry the entire offense and defense by himself. While Tatum has been active, so far this season we've seen the 2023-24 version of Clipper Paul George (22/5/3). That was our first indication that perhaps Brad Stevens had solved time travel. He's looked far better than he ever did as a Sixer, so that was notable right from the start.
Last night? In this game, they needed something closer to 2015-17 IND Paul George or perhaps 2018-19 OKC Paul George. That was especially true once Payton Pritchard left in the 2nd half with an eye injury. How did George respond over those final 24 minutes?
15 points, 2 more steals, 5-10 (3-5) shooting and the biggest shots of the night down the stretch to close things out.
This did not look like a 36 year old. This looked like Prime Paul George, only without the dunking. They'll talk a lot about how he's finally healthy and blah blah blah and while that may be true, I see it as cover. The more logical explanation is that the Celtics have actually figured out how to go back in time and bring those older versions of Paul George into 2026.
Maybe that's why they were willing to do this trade in the first place. Has anyone considered that? I certainly didn't until the games started and we could see how fucking good George has looked. From the very first second of the very first preseason game it was clear, so is it really that crazy of a theory?
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How did they do it? I keep going back to this
What if the return of PG13 is what opened up some sort of portal for time travel that allows the old PG13 to teleport to 2026-27? I know, I know, it sounds ridiculous. I'm just going to have to ask you to watch those highlights again and tell me that there isn't a 0.0000000000000000000001% chance that this is what's happening right now.
We're getting 1st Team All Defense play on one end, and then on the other end he's been efficient and already has 2 massive daggers in the first 8 games. Not only is he playing at an All Star level, he's playing at an All NBA level. The last time that happened? The run from 2015-2021.
So you tell me. Is it more likely he's just healthy and doesn't have miles on his legs yet this season or that Brad Stevens found a way to bend time and space to bring us a player that many thought was a thing of the past? Exactly.
- For the most part, I think there's a pretty big misconception when it comes to Derrick White's season. He's actually been pretty fucking good. His defensive playmaking remains elite, his offensive playmaking especially out of the P&R is still elite, he's been great at the rim and in the paint, he's also been pretty damn solid when it comes to C&S 3s. The issue, has been his shooting off the dribble/pull ups. I think coming off his shooting season last year it has put a lot of people on edge, and it blinds them to a lot of the ways he's still impacting the game at a high level.
Having said that, shotmaking is important. We can't just sit and pretend it isn't, especially on a night when the star is out and Pritchard leaves the game. That's a situation where Derrick has to do all that stuff AND make shots. It took a little while, but when the team needed him to execute, he stepped up and came through
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Easily one of his best offensive performances of the season, and if we're being honest my sanity needed something like this. I don't give two shits that it came against a bad team. This game presented high leverage opportunities that White needed to handle, and outside of that one missed open 3PA I think he met the challenge. Whatever helps him potentially get his confidence and aggressiveness back is all I'm looking for, I don't really care who it comes against.
Because let's also tell the truth about something. The offensive regresison was a huge factor in why the Celts playoff ceiling was limited last year. For this team to hit their potential, we need more of 2023-25 Derrick White offensively and less 2025-26. I thikn we all understand the overall impact and what he does defensively and why that's important. But if we're talking about truly reaching their ceiling as a team, this is the type of offensive production they're going to need and I would say he still isn't fully back from deep yet.
But the 18 FGA? The aggressiveness to get into the paint? That's the trend I'd like to see DWhite continue to play towards. We already know that against tough defenses, it's possible that Pritchard is going to be removed from the equation. While he's been terrific, I do not think we can put all our eggs into the Paul George basket. That's not fair to him at this stage. So Derrick White having a bounce back offensive season is pretty significant if this team wants to be serious.
- We all have eyes, we all could see that the Bucks' frontcourt is mostly dogshit. There was no reason that this matchup shouldn't have been a nice bounce back opportunity for Queta/Mitch, especially Robinson. My expectation for both is that they are able to have their way with Myles Turner and Kel'el Ware.
Overall, I'd say that's exactly what happened
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Specifically for Mitch, this was MUCH closer to what I think we're all expecting in terms of production.
19 minutes / 10 rebounds (6 OREB) / 1 block / 1 steal / +5
What made his minutes so devastating as a Knicks was that they were ALWAYS impactful. The second he stepped on the floor, he did something to help contribute to winning. Deflections, steals, blocks, rebounds. All of the margin plays you need to swing a game, that's where he was at his best. It's why Brad gave him the full MLE. He was paying for the production around the margins.
As a Celtic, none of that shit has been happening before last night. His OREB had disappeared, his defense looked brutal, he wasn't causing deflections or getting steals. The very things he was brought in to do, he was simply not doing.
So to see him get back to those very things is what I would call progress. I know he was 1-8 which is #bad, but I also don't give a shit about that with Mitch. I care about rebounds and defensive playmaking. If he continues to give 19-minute shifts just like we saw last night, that's good enough for me. What matters is that he continues to generate extra possessions offensively and then also finds a way to help generate TOs. If he does that? I'm happy.
I'd also like to see his teammates start throwing him better lobs. As of now, they are throwing him lobs that should only be thrown to Prime Robert Williams. Mitch can't jump like that, so stop throwing the ball so goddamn high. I'd say he's had at least 10-11 lobs so far this year that have been terrible passes, and I think that's helped shaped the perception around him. He's shown he can finish those plays if you give him a decent pass, so once that gets cleaned up I expect his P&R production to jump as well.
- It's early, but Baylor Scheierman is starting to separate himself a little bit in my eyes when it comes to the young wings. He was pretty massive in this game in terms of taking it upon himself to prevent things from truly spiraling in the 3rd quarter, and overall I've been really impressed with his all around play (9/11/1/1 and 3-4 from deep).
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His C&S production has been elite to start the year, averaging a very good 47% on his 2.4 attempts. Over these last few games, his off ball shooting has really helped stabilize things, and that was very evident during this game when nobody could really make a shot. Then late, it wa Baylor Scheierman who kept crashing the glass and coming away with massive OREBs to extend possessions and hold off any sort of late game Bucks push.
He's also basically never turning the ball over, so at this point I don't see too many reasons why he shouldn't be granted more minutes. I get Hugo has shown flashes as a starter which is nice, but Baylor so far has been the best all around player of them all, which is a leap I think we were all hoping for.
- Rebounding and turnover suppression. Wild what can happen when the Celts don't get lazy in both of those areas isn't it? Almost like that's the whole point of their approach and when they are elite in both areas, they win. How about that!
- Shoutout Garzilla. It's at the point now where you can just pencil him in for 11 points on 4-7 (3-4) off the bench every night. He's easily been their most consistent big this season and it all just makes me so happy.
He's clearly putting in the work, Joe is giving him minutes, and the Basketball Gods continue to reward his hard work and dedication. I have no doubt someone is going to offer him close to the full MLE this summer, and he's earned every penny of it.
The Bad
- Consider me slightly concerned over this Payton Pritchard eye injury. After getting hit in the face on 3 separate occasions, the final one to the eye has me worried. You mess around with a cornea injury or anything like that and we're big time fucked.
I'm not exactly sure what a right eye abrasion is since I'm not a doctor, but it didn't look good the way Pritchard reacted. I'm hoping for the best and expecting the worst, because losing Payton for a prolonged stretch would be a pretty massive issue even if you don't think he's played that well so far this year. It's not as if they are super deep at guard even with him in the lineup.
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There's a chance Brad Stevens may have to hop back in his time machine and bring us Prime Grizzlies Mike Conley if this is a serious injury.
- The Jordan Walsh experience so far has been a bit of a mixed bag. For me, as a Jordan Walsh stock holder, recent play hasn't been great. If he's out there for defense and open C&S 3s, then I need him to be defending and making his open C&S 3s.
It hasn't felt like his POA defense is at the level it needs to be, and while there's been some decent jump shooting games, overall I would say his offensive production is still very much a work in progress. At the very least, I'll take one of the two but we cannot have situations where they are not getting defense or off ball shooting from Walsh. If that's the case, then you have to just roll with Hugo/Baylor.
He was a -4 in his 11 minutes last night while Hugo/Baylor were a combined +20, and I'd sy that matched the eye test.
- I know it's a me problem, but Paul George cannot miss 3 4th quarter FTs in a close game. We're starting to see this pop up in these close games, with George, Tatum and Payton. I'm not saying they need to be perfect all game, but the 4th quarter FT shooting needs to be.
The Ugly
- I'd say blowing a 21 point lead to the Bucks fits this section. Some of the worst basketball we've ever see this team play showed up over the final 24 minutes, and for me it starts defensively.
VERY VERY BAD
38 points in the 3rd quarter while allowing 66/75% shooting? Grow the fuck up. The Bucks only had 41 points at halftime! We saw Joe call several timeouts, we saw him try every lineup under the sun, so I'm sorry, I'm looking at the players for this collapse. A complete shit sandwhich in terms of execution on both ends of the floor, and it's the same story every time.
They forget how to defend, get zero stops, and then on the other end have a shooting variance stretch which causes everyone to panic and get tight. Then they still continue to get zero stops and the next thing you know they're trailing after being up by 21 points. Why a lot of people continue to skip over the defensive issues in these collapses and instead just scream 3PT SHOOTING will always baffle me. Be honest about what we're watching!
Was the shooting horrific? Yup! But collapses start by your defense falling apart. If you don't defend, you die. That's how it has always been and always will be. Notice how once the Celts defense tightened up in the 4th quarter it didn't really hurt them that they shot 30/9% in the 4th and only scored 22 points? That's not an accident.
It sure looked like they thought the Bucks would just mail it in, and instead they came out swinging. I can't say I love that, because it was very obvious that's how they were going to play after getting embarrassed in the first 24 minutes. To not be ready for that punch back is pretty inexcusable to me.
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But at the end of the day, as I said a win is a win is a win. Gross, but it still counts as a W which is all that matters. What I do know is if this is how they look and execute defensively against the Sixers next week, they're going to get blown the fuck out.