$161,628,892 in Career Earnings Later, Amar'e Stoudemire is Now a Police Officer in Miami
NY Post – Stoudemire, 43, graduated from the Miami-Dade Police Academy Wednesday “after months of rigorous training” and will join the county’s school police department.
“Amar’e Stoudemire made his mark on the basketball court. A six-time NBA All-Star, 2003 Rookie of the Year and newly inducted Basketball Hall of Famer, he played for some of the league’s biggest teams, including our very own Miami Heat,” Miami Dade College posted on Instagram, alongside pictures of Stoudemire’s graduation.
Today, he’s celebrating a very different milestone: graduating from the MDC School of Justice Basic Law Enforcement Academy after months of rigorous training,” the post continued.
“And he’s graduating with special recognition, receiving the Harry ‘Coach’ Everett Award for his contributions to the success of the academy program throughout his training,” the college added.
Look at Amar'e Stoudemire and his small hat. He's a cop now. In Miami. Good for Amar'e Stoudemire. If only all police officers were 6-foot-10 professional athletes who made approximately $161,628,892 in career earnings and joined the force purely for the love of the game, the world would be a better place.
I feel like that sounded sarcastic, but that is kind of the ideal police officer, right? Someone who doesn't feel the stress of being underpaid, living paycheck to paycheck, who might be susceptible to... idk, you've seen Training Day. I can say with almost 100% certainty that Amar'e Stoudemire will not get Training Day'd (or Training Day someone else) as a Miami-Dade police officer.
I'm especially confident in that statement because Amar'e Stoudemire is specifically joining the Miami-Dade Schools Police Department.
I mean, it would be pretty wild if a fellow public school officer tricked Amar'e Stoudemire into taking PCP on his first day. And then a bunch of kids had to do the "King Kong ain't got shit on me" scene with Amar'e Stoudemire and Jamie Foxx in the middle school gym.
Sorry, I'll get off Training Day. Amar'e Stoudemire has always wanted to be a cop. There's a line of officers in his family history. And he made a point of completing all the police academy training with no special treatment. He wanted to earn his place like everyone else. Like a really, really, really tall version of everyone else.
Amar'e Stoudemire is going to be the best school police officer ever. If his 6-foot-10 stature alone wasn't enough to immediately earn the respect of students (or strike fear into their hearts), being an NBA Hall of Famer certainly will. I sure as hell wouldn't want to get in trouble by Amar'e Stoudemire. I don't want Amar'e Stoudemire thinking I'm a loser. Then he might not play basketball with me at recess. I want to be his Steve Nash and run pick-and-rolls on my friends.
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Amar'e Stoudemire is going to be so fucking good at being the cool basketball-playing cop at recess. Probably the best ever. Some lucky public school in Miami is about to get so much cooler.