Rick Tocchet Has Diagnosed The Flyers' Problem, And Apparently It's Because The Defenseman Are "Too Horny" On The Ice
Rich Graessle. Getty Images.The Flyers obviously have a ton of issues right now. For starters, they can't win a freaking hockey game. That's a pretty big one if you ask me. 0-5-2 to start the season. In those 8 losses, they have scored a total of 10 goals. They have the fewest shot per game in the NHL, the fewest amount of goals, the fewest amount of wins. It seems like they can't even break out of their own zone. They can't complete a pass through the neutral zone. They can't cleanly enter the offensive zone with possession. This team just flat out sucks.
There are obviously a lot of issues to deal with. But maybe, just maybe, all of those issues are stemming from one major issue. Perhaps there is one giant flaw with this team which is dragging down the rest of their game. Maybe once they fix this issue, everything else will begin to resolve itself.
That issue? Well according to Dr. Rick Tocchet's diagnosis, it would seem as if the defenseman on this team are simply too horny.
I mean…I get it. We all get horny sometimes.
It's just funny to think that the Flyers are winless through 8 games because the defensemen are all too bricked up during the games. Bunch of dudes out there all fully torqued, all too busy trying to flip it up into their waistband instead of thinking about when the jump up into the play.
Maybe what the Flyers need to do is just stop heading out onto the ice with a bunch of loaded guns. Maybe if they all crack stick before the game, they won't be gripping their hockey sticks too tight on the ice. Just rub one out before the game and then they'll finally seem more calm, cool and collected out on the ice. Clear your mind a little, fellas. There are still 76 games left in this season to turn things around, and it all starts with punching your balls before the game. The rest of it will all start to fall into place from there.