It's Do Or Die In Cleveland Tomorrow

Michael Reaves. Getty Images.

Yesterday was an amazing night. 

Until it wasn't. I knew vibes were bad when Mintz was tasked with going to the game to annoy me. The second that shtick started I knew the Sox may be in for trouble. 

Knowing Mintz was there solely to piss me off pissed me off more than if he was there just hanging out with us. I snapped on Mintz for a second, but have apologized. That was completely uncouth of me. I just was outraged at that he cut open a moving box full of merch addressed to me without asking and proceeded to drip mustard all over it, as it was earmarked for someone else. 

And once the game started, I forgot Mintz was even there, and I mean that in a good way.

Anyways, I don't know what the fuck happened to the Sox pitching staff over the last 2 ballgames, but they can't find the strike zone. At all. Were the lights too bright? I don't want to say yes, but…yes. For Hagen Smith at the very least. Dude was just way too amped up. Home plate was bouncing off the walls when he'd release.

7 free passes yesterday. 10 the day before. 

Gotta clean that shit up. Oh, and the Sox have to start hitting dingers again. Like, starting tomorrow.

Or the season is over. Simple as that. 

The good news is this: Sean Burke will more than likely be on the bump tomorrow and on just about a full rest, and Sean Burke has SHOVED against Cleveland this year. 

I truthfully thought this series was over on Wednesday. Yesterday I felt a little nervous, but I thought the bats would come alive under Chicago's night skies with 40,000 lunatics screaming at the top of their lungs. Unfortunately, that was a no-go. It fucking sucks, but it is what it is. 

But WSD, how do you feel today? 

Like shit. I can't drink anymore, let alone drink heavily multiple days in a row. The Tate family is a gaggle of animals. 

No, WSD, how do you feel about game 5 you short re…moron?

Complete and total coin flip. There's no other way to put it, it's a 50/50 shot of who advances to the ALCS tomorrow. 

But speaking of the Tate family, we are officially doing a home and home due to the White Sox inability to close out the series in Chicago: 

5 hour roadtrip to a city I've driven through 1000x to get to the east coast, but never once actually visited because it's fucking Cleveland.

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Pumped for what's to come, though. I'm locked and loaded with two bags of grass, 75 pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Modelo, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls. 

Not that we need all that for the trip, but when you're going to Cleveland for a do or die baseball game, you need to be amped the all the way to a million. Anything I can do for my club to get a dub, i will. 

Let's fucking RIDE.