Knee Jerk Reactions to Week 3: Patriots vs. Jaguars

Things to consider while preferring the sweet release of a watery grave in the Atlantic to all of this:

--Can you blame me? Maybe I'm just overreacting to the moment, but I don't think so. Today this feels more like all the people I was railing against two weeks ago for abandoning ship on Drake Maye were just ahead of the curve. And now there's no room on the lifeboats for me. 

--As bad as things got in the Late Belichick- and throughout the Mayo Era, this feels somehow much worse. Then, we were in the post-imperial phase of the Dynasty. We were Western Europe after Rome fell, an interregnum with no ruler and no one qualified to maintain the basic functions of society. But last year it had been largely restored under a new Emperor. One who was better equipped to lead us into a new epoch. With a young general who seemed invincible in battle and was feared by all the Successor States that tried to fill the power vacuum left by the old Empire. This was supposed to be a time we saw that former glory restored. Now it just seems like the Dark Ages all over again.

--And all this coming after another seemingly terrific offseason. In free agency and the trade market, the Patriots fattened up like it was Bear Week. The new additions were going to prove last season was not a fluke. That they weren't just a product of luck, or playing a Missouri Valley schedule. Instead, they're last in the league in scoring. Did nothing particularly well in a humiliating defeat. And worst of all, their franchise quarterback looks irreparably damaged. 

--I'm the last guy to be a doomer. A legitimate case can be made that this is the exact same situation we found ourselves in after three games last year. They were 1-2. Coming off a hideous, mistake-filled loss. Heading to Buffalo, seemingly on their way to 1-3. Where they pulled off an impressive win and went on a tear. If the 2025 Patriots can turn it around after three weeks, and hell, if the 2026 Red Sox can do it after three atrocious months, there should be no reason to despair right now. But after this debacle, I'm in no mood to try and throw a couple of coats of polish on this turd. And because exactly 2/3 of you are making me do this:

... I'm going to use the next 1,500 words as therapy.

--And so far, this year's edition of the Pats is that thing you had so much hope for, but turns out to be a crushing disappointment. It's Season 8 of Game of Thrones. The finale of LOST. That cute actress you like so much who shows up on the red carpet sporting the Generic Hollywood Botox Face. Madden of the past decade or so. "Somehow, Palpatine returned." Just another institution that seemed poised for greatness, overpromised, and underdelivered. 

--This game was a Trevor Lawrence campaign ad. With beautiful images of him standing tall in the pocket, delivering perfect spirals. Throwing touchdown passes just above the outstretched arms of the few pass rushers he saw. Jump cut to black-and-white images of Drake Maye having the ball slip out of his hands, throwing picks, seeming to be in tears on the sideline, over ominous, funereal music. "Trevor Lawrence is a strong, confident leader who's fighting for America. Drake Maye can't be trusted with our future. Vote for the quarterback you can trust. Not the one with blood on his hands.":

… it no matter what.

“Paid for by the Patriots Haters PAC, and not authorized by any candidate or candidate’s committee.” 

--I'm not about to deny Jared Wilson's blood was on the ball, and that's what caused it to slip out of Maye's hands. I mean, something had to. It's not like he's got a history of the ball coming out of his hands sideways, like when you're at the dog park and throw the Frisbee over your shoulder, just to watch your good boy run after nothing:

--Maye hasn't suddenly developed lobster claw hands. And blood can be extra slippery. Ask the ship's doctor performing emergency surgeries in the middle of a battle on an 18th century Man O' War. Or any couple [Trigger Warning] who doesn't let nature get in the way of their physical expressions of love. (Sorry.) But to slip that badly, Jared Wilson had to have been bleeding like the Black Knight:

Giphy Images.

They should've called time, brought out the yellow police tape and treated the line of scrimmage like a crime scene. Or not. I honestly don't know. Because in a lifetime wasted watching this sport, I've never once seen this happen to any quarterback. And while it definitely sounds like something that could only happen to the Jets or Browns, it's the defining moment of the 2026 Pats as of right now.

--While we'll never be seeing the end of that video, I can live with a fumble because a blood-soaked football is slippy and not grippy. That's a physical mistake and a freak occurrence that we'll likely never see again. What's impossible to swallow are the interceptions. There was no part of Efton Chism that was open. He looked like he was wearing the Travis Hunter costume he picked up at Spirit Halloween:

The decision to target a completely blanketed receiver was bad enough. What makes it worse is the complete lack of situational awareness. What makes it even worse to the point of being unforgivable is that this is a consistent pattern now. There is simply effort to take care of the football in the red zone. They drove the ball into Jacksonville territory seven times and scored three points. I don't intend to get lost in the weeds of the numbers, because they're not necessary to make the point you can see with your own eyes. But on the season, they've had 30 drives and scored a total of 29 points. You don't have to able to solve Fermat's Last Theorem to know 0.97 points per possession is historically awful. 

--As a result, we've yet again witnessed a situation where they had the ball at the end of the half with a chance to put points on the board, then get it back to start the 3rd quarter and bookend the halftime with scoring drives. And once again they came away with zero and zero. Instead of keeping their defense off the field for a the better part of an hour, the turnover forced them to strap their helmets back on, defend seven plays and damn near give up a 70-yard field goal that had the distance, but was wide by a foot. Followed by a drive after the half that did its job. They ran 10 plays and took 5:10 off the clock. Only to see Andy Borregalas shank a kick just about half that distance. One that was already Wide Right before it reached the LOS. That's 2026 in microcosm.

--Staying with that drive before the half, it was due mainly to Maye's best throw of the day. To Pop Douglas sitting in the Cover-2 hole:

And yet when they got to 1st & goal from the 5, the focus clearly became getting the Jaguars to burn their timeouts. A Read Option run by Maye. A dive by Rhamondre Stevenson. Both calls designed to protect the defense once Jacksonville got the ball back, more than give the Pats four chances to make it a 14-10 game. Let me invent an expression right now that has never been used before. Tha's not coaching to win; it's coaching … not to lose. Genius, I know. Copyright, Old Balls LLC. All rights reserved. 

--It's practically impossible to watch this team over the first three games and conclude anything other than they've not been ready for the season, any more than they at the start of last year. The defense that was so effective in Seattle and dominant against Pittsburgh, imploded under the strain of all the turnovers and their own breakdowns. Lawrence's snap count cast a spell over them, to the point they committed more neutral zone infractions than the Romulans did in all of Star Trek canon. Two on consecutive downs, and a third by Milton Williams not long thereafter. And Mack Hollis committed a taunting penalty that turned what should have been a 4th & 1 in the red zone into a 4th & 16 at the 22, and a field goal. While his team was down by 25. No situational awareness. Minimum discipline. Dumbfuckery. Burning timeouts because you can't get the play call in and the ball snapped on time. Now that's playing TO lose. 

--Staying with the defense a while more, they never generated anything the experts would mistake for a pass rush. Christian Elliss, who I thought last week was the best player on the field for either team aside from Christian Gonzalez, was an absolute non-factor. He and Robert Spillane got overpowered in the run game, as 12 of Jacksonville's 30 attempt were through the A-gaps, and 118 of their 137 yards came after contact. 

--The Jags plan of attack through the air was clearly to avoid Gonzalez and go after everyone else. Carlton Davis being the primary target. The box score says he gave up five catches on six targets. But if those totals were, doubled it would feel about right. 

--And as was happening in Seattle, when the Pats went into split-safety zones, they left MOFO space available in the deep middle and Lawrence didn't miss:

Of course Jakobi Meyers was going to go off. It was inevitable. Though to be fair to the secondary, I was laying back in a recliner with my slippered feet up and in IPA in my hand, and I was less comfortable than Lawrence was in the middle of the pocket. 

--And sometimes, you run up against a team that's simply doing everything right. For instance, Parker Washington made an insanely athletic grab on a touchdown pass that was called back on a penalty. So he simply made a better catch on the very next snap. While wearing Marcus Jones like a bathrobe:

--Since I'm as confused and out of sync as the Pats were on both sides of the ball, I'm not going to try to make this a coherent narrative. I'll simply jump around to whatever is in my notes. For instance, Maye missing again on a wide open receiver who had done his job and beaten the coverage with a pass that might actually win him the Federal Duck Stamp Art Contest:

--I'll echo something Troy Brown pointed out. That Kyle Williams been sent on a Go route attacks his job with an intensity you don't see when he's asked to run any other kind of route. Not that I'm putting the blame for Maye's second interception on anyone but the guy who put the ball in the triangle of the "4" on Jarrian Jones's jersey. But Brown didn't to be Mr. Patriot with effort like he saw on this play:

--While Romeo Doubs managed three catches for 49 yards, my son had a fair point when he said Doubs couldn't be more covered on every route if the cornerback was handcuffed to him. For example, on the catch that was negated by the OPI call on him. We're all still figuring his game out, but it seems like he's one of those guys who is either going to have to schemed open, or win all the 50/50 balls, because he's not going to generate space on his own.

--It's time to start wondering if Hunter Henry is washed. He was a non-factor yesterday. And on the season is producing at a Ryan Izzo pace. I'm praying that's not the case. I have no intentions of going back to the Lovecraftian horror of days Izzo was our TE1

--While I'm in no mood for positivity, there were bright spots. Gabe Jacas and Elijah Ponder, for instance. Ponder showing he can get his pad levels low at his size and come under a block is encouraging. Especially when Edge was one of our biggest concerns coming into the season and the depth is being tested:

--Furthermore, there's the right side of the offensive line. Will Campbell pretty much took Josh Hines-Allen out of the game entirely. And our own hyphenated guy Alijah Vera-Tucker has been as advertised. As bad as the run game has been, putting Maye into a constant state of 3rd & longs, when they ran to Campbell and AVT's side, they averaged over 5 yards per carry. When the ran to the right, it dropped to half that. Which might explain how Caleb Lomu got 26 snaps at RT. His time might be now.

--This Week's Applicable Movie Quote: "Would you like to know how you will die? … Beware the man who brings the jaguar. Behold him reborn from mud and earth. For the one he takes you to will cancel the sky, and scratch out the earth. Scratch you out. And end your world. He's with us now. Day will be like night. And the man jaguar will lead you to your end." - The Prophecy of Oracle Girl, Apocalypto 

--This pretty much describes the mood around New England at the moment:

--It's possible this hurts most of all:

--Anyway, we're onto the Bronx.

Please make this better. Thank you in advance.