No Offense, But Where The Fuck Does Romeo Doubs Get Off Thinking It's OK For Him To Wear Gronk's #87 In New England?
So Kay Adams asked Gronk about this this week on her show she holds him at gunpoint every week on and, because Rob Gronkowski is apparently a much more mature and well-adjusted human being than I am, he basically shrugged his shoulders and said he wasn’t consulted but he doesn’t care. His stance is that Tom Brady’s #12 is really the only Patriots number that absolutely needs to be retired, and unless you played somewhere for 20 years, numbers should eventually go back into circulation.
That’s incredibly gracious of him. And very evolved and reasonable.
But allow me to speak for my friend Rob, who is clearly FAR too understanding and reasonable about this situation-
This is absolute horseshit. I’m sorry, with all due respect here, we’re talking about Romeo fucking Doubs??? We’re giving Rob Gronkowski’s fucking number to Romeo Doubs?
This is the greatest tight end who ever lived. A guy who spent a decade in New England, won three Super Bowls, terrorized the entire NFL, rewrote the position and turned the number 87 into one of the most recognizable numbers in Boston sports. And we’re just handing it out at the equipment room now like it’s a pair of practice shorts?
What kind of operation are you running here Vrabel??
And before the nerds start hitting me with WELL ACTUALLY OTHER PEOPLE HAVE WORN 87 SINCE GRONK… i don’t give a fuck, that doesn’t make it better. That means we’ve been allowing and committing crimes for years. I understand Doubs wore 87 in Green Bay. Fine, that’s his packer number.
But you know what else? You’re not in Green Bay anymore pal.
There are six Lombardi Trophies sitting in the building and about 20 years of childhood memories I am emotionally incapable of separating from professional football. And I hate to break it to you but sometimes you move somewhere new and shit changes.
Like say that I clear it with Epstein’s buddies and get the thumbs up and I move into Buckingham Palace tomorrow, I’m not asking King Charles to clear out of the master bedroom because “that’s normally where I sleep.”
Know your surroundings. And even more importantly, know your fucking role jabroni -
And MAYBE- just MAYBE - I could swallow this disrespect if Romeo Doubs came storming into New England and immediately looked like Randy Moss.
You want 87 buddy? Fine. Go catch 11 balls for 180 yards and two touchdowns and make me shut my mouth.
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Instead, do you know what Romeo Doubs did in his Patriots debut?
ZERO CATCHES.
Three targets. Nothing. Nada. Niente. goose egg. And then, even better, with the Patriots tied 10-10 in the fourth quarter against Seattle, Drake throws him a ball in the flats on a crossing pattern while Doubs is WIDE FUCKING OPEN and this happens-
It would’ve gone for at least 33 yards and put New England deep into Seattle territory. Instead, Maye throws an interception on the very next play, Seattle eventually kicks the game-winning field goal, and the Patriots lose 13-10.
I’m not saying that didn’t swing the game. Well yes actually I am. Momentum is real. Very real.
The entire fucking game turned right there. And the guy who dropped it was running around with GRONK’S 87 ON HIS BACK.
Do you understand how offensive this is?
Gronk wore 87 while dragging three defenders down the field like toddlers hanging onto their father’s legs. Never seeing a flag thrown, ever. Guys were allowed to assault him before the ball ever came close to him. Guy had cracked ribs and could barely walk after the Seahawks Super Bowl.
Romeo Doubs comes waltzing into town on a very overvalued contract, drawing oppositions #2, or #3 best defensive backs, and helps himself to one of our icons numbers.
Rob can take the high road all he wants. Good for him. He really has matured.
But fuck that. Until Romeo Doubs starts catching footballs like the gigantic lunatic who made that number sacred in New England, we neeed to protect Gronk’s honor against his wishes and demand he wear a different number going forward.