The Stat Hole: Stupid Sports Stats From the Past Week — October 6, 2026
Back for another Tuesday drop-in to walk through the past week in sports from the lens of stats you didn’t know on stories you do. None of these nuggets will make you any smarter about sports, but they might give you enough ammo for the workplace water cooler to sound like you are.
We’re starting to build something here. By that I mean this blog got two comments last week and both were positive. Hard to do. I’m aiming to get these out more consistently and give readers a reason to come back every Tuesday. Both of them. Hopefully soon enough these blogs will move up the ranks when Sydney Sweeney's boobs take an off week. But I implore you to reach out to me on Twitter or comment below on any weird thing you notice that deserves a proper data query. Last week we ran the list of NFL players with the most receiving yards in a game without a catch, 4th and 16 checkdowns when trailing late, teams last time going 1-8 during any nine-game stretch, and a few other completely inconsequential lookups from my database I've procured over the last few years like a total lunatic.
If you enjoyed my NFL Sad Stats blogs - "The Stat Hole" is my pivot that aims to include all sports while being inclusive to more than just the sad genre. But there will be plenty of sad too. Which leads us to the start for this week. My sad, sad, sad Cubbies.
The Cubs #1 offense in baseball went 0-20 from their Top-3 in the lineup during their pathetic two-game series vs the Padres
Never a bad thing to be compared to Knoblauch, Jeter, and Justice. Never mind. I guess there's one way. And the sad Cubs found it, because this was the most pathetic whimper of a playoff appearance perhaps in the history of the game. They trailed for 17/18 total innings, and never got a hit out of PCA, Bregman, or Busch who represented the top of the order for the best offense in baseball.
Just a complete pile of turd on a stick. Dansby Sweeney had a chance to turn things around. The camera panned to the Padres manager calling the pen to get someone quick with a 3-0 count and proceeded to swing at two of the worst pitches you'll ever see from a pitcher that everyone in the stadium knew had completely lost his control. The Cubs also revitalized Joe Musgrove who hasn't pitched in two years. The fact that the Cubs had no pitching was a given. And boy it showed. But to see this from the best offense in baseball is the most baseball thing ever. 162-game sample size means nothing when you run up against a juggernaut.
Enough about the MLB Playoffs. We have more important topics of discussion.
Three days into the NHL season and we had a goalie outscoring Conner McDavid. The beloved goalie goal. 21st ever from what I was able to pull anyway. And let me tell you, from the audit trail this concept sure appears to be trending. Six of the 21 all-time goalie goals have occurred in the last four seasons.
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This is pretty wild. I have to think old-school goalie generations are cracking open Labatt Blues on the couch bitching to their wives about how in the old days goalies were there to stop the puck. Damn kids and their antics and doing cool things. I imagine Billy Smith feels that way. He's the first to ever do it and the only one during a loss. During a delayed penalty the opposing team shot at Smith who blocked it, then in an attempt to send it to the point, the puck just sailed all the way in for the goal. Because Smith was the last Islander to touch it, he was credited.
Martin Brodeur is the real story from this list though. I'm adding his 3-goals as a goalie to my "records that will never be broken" list. DIBS EVERYONE!
NFL Sad Stats!
The Los Average Chargers are back to perfect .500 franchise record at 505-505-11. I wrote about this a few years ago and the curse is still going strong. This team will continue to both excite and disappoint. What a move my McDaniels to sprinkle in a Philly Special before they had scored a single touchdown. It went as expected. Just a total disaster of a team this is. It sure seems like all the stars have to align for a Mike McDaniels offense to work. I think at this point the Chargers would be better off letting this play out though as awful as that sounds. If it clicks, things can change quick. Just kind of pathetic he didn't have this team ready in the preseason. But whatever the Chargers decide to do, we know will be wrong.
This team is so bad they are starting to rub off on their opponents.
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The Jets went 0-7 on 3rd down which was not the worst 3rd down performance of the day
0-12 on third down were the Philadelphia Eagles. Pretty confident at this point Nick Siriani is the Trent Dilfer of Super Bowl winning coaches. There's just nothing there. Nothing. A great offensive line and stacked squad across the board won them a Super Bowl and made it impossible for him to screw it up. This is the aftermath, Philly.
Let's check in on the Dolphins.
Alright, that's enough Dolphins.
Speaking of the Jets, they're lucky Kyle Monangai didn't get two more touches on Sunday because that would have meant he'd have more touches on offense than the entire New York Jets had plays. 31 total touches for the Bears back vs 32-plays for the Jets.