Dumping Them Out – USA Hates Offside

John Rich6/28/2026 7:41 PM

Welcome back to another episode of Dumping Them Out. Happy World Cup knockout round day to those who celebrate. Only one game today. Canada vs South Africa. Go Canada. Do it for North America.

It seems like the biggest takeaway from ~~American~~ United Statesian soccer fans who rarely watch the sport (sorry, I learned it's disrespectful to call ourselves Americans), is that the offsides rule is out of control. See tweet from USA representative Nicky Smokes.

In response to complaining United Statesmen, I've seen a handful of responses like this.

Kind of a fair point. It's probably a bit frustrating to be a die hard soccer fan, then have a bunch of new comers tell you the rules of your sport are wrong. But I think we should have the rules of our favorite sports critiqued by people who never/rarely watch them more often. There are a lot of rules in sports that have been in place for so long that we've just come to accept them, despite them being patently ridiculous.

For example, any time a basketball player takes a jump shot where he leans into contact and gets rewarded with free throws. That's insane. Any person with fresh eyes would tell you that's the stupidest thing ever. Somebody with fresh eyes would also probably tell you the way we hyper-analyze what constitutes a catch in football is also pretty ridiculous. Things of that nature. Maybe it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world to let some European soccer fans point out things in American sports that seem like obvious, common sense flaws.

That being said, as an every 4 years (and the occasional game in between) soccer viewer, the offside rule can be a little exhausting. But I don't hate the spirit of it. It kinda seems like a rule that was made for lack of a better option, and it just so happened to work out pretty well. It's like they needed to do something to prevent cherry picking, and keep the game confined to a certain space, so someone threw out the idea, "Why don't we just make the offside line where the last defender is? Sure that works."

My only real problem with offside in soccer the same problem I have with penalties & video review in American football. It prevents you from fully celebrating any scoring play, because you're just waiting for the offside, or the pass interference, or the "he didn't have two feet down" shoe to drop. It takes away from the natural flow of the game. Idk if there's really a fix to that, but if I were a soccer player, I would stink at celebrating, because every goal I scored I'd just be waiting for the offsides shoe to the drop. I would never fully believe that I actually scored a goal until after the ensuing kickoff.

Actually, I have one more problem. I don't like how a player can be called for offside on a rebound. We (USA) had a goal called back against Turkey because one of our players took a shot, the goalie saved it, and the player who scored the rebound was in offside position at the time of the shot. Once a shot hits the goalie, all bets should be off. That seems reasonable to me.

But again, who the hell am I to say? Soccer is the most popular sport in the world. They're clearly doing something right. However… there is some precedent for soccer changing the offside rule to benefit the attacking team.

In 1863, when offside was originally introduced, a player needed to have 3 opposing players (goalie included) between him and the goal.

In 1925, the changed the rule to something similar to what it is today, where a player only needs to have two players between him and the goal. Typically that's one defender + the goalie. Except for in the Iran-Egypt game the other day, which confused the hell out of everyone.

Since 1925, for the longest time, an attacker had to be fully in front of the defender to be considered onside. It wasn't until 1990 when the International Football Association Board changed the rule to say an attacker simply had to be level with the defender to be considered onside. That's the rule we have today.

So hell… if every 60ish years soccer updates their rule to favor the offense, maybe it's only a matter of time before the amend something else.

As a matter of fact, it sounds like FIFA's Chief of Global Football Development, who I assume is important to some degree, says he's interested in changing the offside rule to benefit the offense even further.

I like the idea. Because before VAR, a player this close to onside almost certainly would not have drawn a flag from the ref.

With the super high-tech down-to-the-millimeter video review system we have in place now, there must be more goals called back due to offside than there were before VAR. Because to the naked eye, a play like that looks perfectly fine. The attacker seems to be onside by the spirit of the rule. So if we're going to be so nitpicky on video review, maybe it makes sense to give the offense a little more room to work with.

But still… what would giving the offense an extra few feet really accomplish? Attackers are still going to cut it as close as they possibly can based on wherever the line is set. Reviews will still come down to paper thin margins. Maybe it will satisfy fans for a bit, because they'll remember how just last year, the play they're mad about now would have been offside by a significant margin. But once people become accustomed to the new rule, were all just going to start complaining again. No matter where you set offside, players will always cut it close, and people are always going to complain.

Thank you for tuning into a special, "United States of American who barely watches soccer telling soccer how to run their sport" edition of Dumping Them Out. Viva La USA. Rock, flag, and eagle.