Which Barstool Employees Would Make The Best Trial Of Seven Team?

On this week's My Mom's Basement, we discussed the latest episode of A Knight Of The Seven Kingdoms which had the much-awaited Trial Of Seven battle. Lives were lost, legends were made, and a 9.8 IMDb rating was registered.

Since this is Barstool, we followed up our conversation full of hot takes by making it about ourselves and trying to figure out which employees in a company full of unathletic people would make the best Trial Of Seven team. KFC and Robbie were captains for one team while myself and Nick Hamilton were captains for another (Brendan Clancy filled in since Nick was too busy proposing to join our little fantasy nerd debate).

This is how the draft panned out:

The first picks were pretty chalky since both Feits and Biz love to scrap yet are also A+ locker room guys. In my opinion, Biz was the better selection considering he actually had a Trial of Seven where he fought seven bastards himself. But that just may be my bias talking (It's not).

Moving along, Team KFox took Rico Bosco since he is a madman that (almost) has a body on his record here at Barstool. We countered by drafting Portnoy since we would essentially get Rico on our team since he can turn into Reeko Bosco around the bossman.

Advertisement

Dave is also the boss and would essentially be immune from people actually trying to kill him, making this a no-brainer pick.

HOWEVAH, KFC and Robbie countered this counter by selecting Kirk Minihane since he is one of the few people at this company that has no problem going at Dave to the point people say he actually enjoys it. An absolute wildcard on the battlefield that any squad would want.

Speaking of battlefields, we took a guy who is a leader of man that won the ultimate prize on the gridiron.

Ezra Shaw. Getty Images.

Coach Gruden isn't just a great tactician either. He also has the genes that caused the apple that fell from his tree to break the powerlifting record.

Kate and Ebony both got selected for being badasses in their own right, Kate as Marine and Ebony as a New Yorker who doesn't take no shit from anybody. They are both also super nice when they aren't fucking shit up, which makes this an even more fascinating matchup.

Finally we ended up with a battle of two Pardon My Take staples with PFT getting the nod for being a rugby player and Max getting selected for being an absolute madman every time something bad happens to his teams in the playoffs.

Advertisement

Getting Max in Berserker Mode could be the difference in a Trial of Seven, plus his hair would fit perfectly with a medieval battle.

There were obviously some tough omissions and honorable mentions in this big ol' company full of misfits. So make sure to let us know who we missed in the comments.

For much more on the draft, the Trail Of Seven episode, and Thrones in general, check out this week's My Mom's Basement: