Tom Brady's Ex-Teammates are Pissed About Him Claiming to Have 'No Dog in the Fight.' But Asante Samuel Has Gone DARK.

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As JFK once put it, "The hottest places in Hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality." In Dante's Inferno, the Neutrals were damned to spend eternity outside of Hell proper, in a vestibule of miserable souls rejected by both Heaven and Hell. And if this is true, then Tom Brady should check to see if Alex Guerrero still has a box of that TB12 Fitness electrolyte energy water that they said prevented sunburn after saying this on the Let's Go podcast:

“I don’t have a dog in the fight in this one. May the best team win. And in terms of the Patriots, this is a new chapter in New England, and I’m glad everyone’s embraced the Mike Vrabel regime, all the amazing players that have worked so hard to get their club to this position. We did it for 20 years. There was a little bit of a hiatus in there, but the Patriots are back and it’s a very exciting time for everyone in New England.

“I just wanna see good football. I wanna see good plays, good throws, good strategy, good decisions.”

We can put up with a lot of stuff. The snake oil salesmanning. The fact he's gone from trying to sell recipes for dehydrated algae and veggie lasagna that's 100% lasagna-free to hawking for Pizza Hut. That producing two documentary series weren't enough; he had to make a full length vanity project movie about four old bags traveling across the country to watch him come back against the Falcons and possibly get boned by him and Gronk. The fact that he and half the leading men in Hollywood are getting the same face like something out of Black Mirror. We can put up with all of it, because Tom Brady gave us six championships and told us "I'm a Patriot for Life." 

That was June of 2024. It took a year and a half for that pledge to be tested, and Brady failed miserably. He decided to stay neutral. To straddle two worlds he now lives in, the top analyst on Fox, and part owner of the Raiders. Two outfits that respect him, but don't love him like New England has. No one at the network is buying his Fox jersey, getting GOAT tattoos or naming their sons Thomas and Brady. No Raiders fan went to fucking jail so that he may be set free:

Giphy Images.

Brady has opted to be Switzerland. A pacifist. A non-combatant. A conscientious objector. And has pleased no exactly one who care about him. Especially not the Band of Brothers who went to battle with him:

But holy moly, Asante Samuel is taking it to the extreme. He's gone totally Broken Arrow:

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To the point he's issuing demands, backed by threats:

I mean, this is supervillain stuff. This is "Batman takes off the mask or people in will die" shit. 

All of which is made even weirder by the fact Samuel has been going to the mattresses for Bill Belichick:

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Meaning he's completely switched sides. Every time I've ever included Samuel in a headline in the 18 years since he left the Patriots, it was about him firing shots at the coach who drafted him, turned him into a Pro Bowler, paid him big money under the Franchise tag, and made him rich:

So Samuel has switched sides. But to his credit, at least he's chosen a side, which is more than we can say about Brady. So bizarre as this is, I can at least respect him for nutting up and taking a stance. 

Tom Brady won't come out and support Mike Vrabel. Tedy Bruschi and Vince Wilfork ripping Brady in public. And Asante Samuel defending Bill Belichick while issuing threats like he plans to blow up Gotham General Hospital if his demands are not met. These are strange days, indeed.