The NHL Will NOT Be Donating $1M to Cancer Charity, Because Some Guy Named Rob Didn't Make a Half-Ice Shot Into a Tiny Puck Sized Hole
Wow, Rob. What the hell was that? Wait to blow it for the entire cancer having community. Do you think that just because you beat cancer that nobody else could use the money? That you can just walk out there between periods without a care in the world and not take your $800,000 half-ice cancer shot seriously? All you had to do was put the puck in the back of this net.
And $800,000 worth of cancer would have been eradicated. It's literally not even that hard.
Sorry, Rob. I'm obviously joking. What an insane position for the NHL to put you in. What a remarkably ill-advised promotion for them to run. How could anybody have thought that was a good idea? How did this "promotion" make it all the way to the ice? They just dangled $800,000 over cancer victim's heads. Money that they were never going to get. They put $800,000 worth of cancer saving responsibly on the shoulders of some guy named Rob Higgins, and gave him a near-impossible task to complete. The hole in that net was so small. It looks half the size of the hole Frank The Tank made his shot through.
If the NHL insists on doing a half-ice-shot-for-cancer promotion between periods, they shouldn't have a board in the net at all. Rob should have been shooting on a wide open net from the near blue line, and he should have had infinite shots to make one. Once you throw out ANY number that's pegged for charity, that money has to end up in charity's hands. If you're only comfortable donating $200,000, then make the shot worth $200,000. And if Rob misses the $200,000 shot, give cancer $200,000 anyways. It's almost impressive how the NHL found a way to make donating $200,000 to charity look bad. That's hard to do.
I'm not exactly sure how the NHL handles their charity donations. They probably have a certain amount of money they plan on giving out every year. Maybe the NHL will wind up donating the same amount of money regardless, and are merely trying to squeeze a few more intermission promos out of this particular $1M. But the optics of that Stadium Series promo are so hilariously bad. Anybody with half-a-brain could have seen this backlash coming.
The NHL has to fire someone. Not because they made a mistake so disastrous the league will never recover. The NHL will be fine. But you can't have somebody with a brain that bad making decisions for your company. If the NHL keeps whoever green-lit that idea employed, at next year's Winter Classic, P.K. Subban will be rolling out someone in anaphylactic shock, and Rob Higgins will have to make a half ice shot to win them an EpiPen.