Real Headline – 44-Year Old Philip Rivers Will Workout For The Indianapolis Colts Tomorrow

No way. No fucking way this is real. I guess if you want Colts fans (who by my estimation have so much as punted on the season since Daniel Jones achilles fell off) to pay attention for the rest of the season... if you want the every American football fan in the world to pay attention to the Colts for the rest of the season... this would certainly do it. If it's eyeballs your after, I can't imagine anything that'll get people paying attention to the free falling Indianapolis Colts more than handing the reigns over to a 44-year old QB.

Philip fucking Rivers. He was too old for the NFL in the 2020 season when he lead the Colts to the playoffs. The man has more kids than most people have living extended family members. There's no way. There's just no way. I've been fooled before. But that's Adam Schefter's real Twitter account. And I suppose if there was ever a team for Philip Rivers to take over, it'd be a team he's familiar with, with the best running back in the NFL, at a point where the season is nearly over. He's clearly smarter than any other option the Colts have to sign right now. I'm sure his arm is... rested. 

There's just no way this comes to fruition. I mean... I'm obviously hoping it does. I'm 100% behind the idea. Because what the fuck else do I have to cheer for as a Colts fan at this point. We're not stealing Jameis away from New York. I'm not interested in dipping back to the Joe Flacco well. This would at least give me a hell of a reason to care about the Colts for the rest of the season, as they close out against the Seahawks, 49ers, Jaguars, and Texans. 

Fuck. Now I've talked myself into it. Please let it be real. Tom Brady was playing in the NFL at 45 years old. George Blanda played his final game for the Raiders at 48. Why couldn't Philip Rivers get it done make it through an NFL game without dying at the ripe age of 44.