Hundreds Of People Gathered To Watch A Student From Indiana University Eat 25 Chicken Tenders....But He Only Ate 19 And Quit
Alright so I started seeing this flyer circulate around a little something we call this internet early this week. Apparently some kid at Indiana University posted it, saying he'd eat 25 chicken fingers outside the Fine Arts Plaza this Friday. Now I'm going to take a quick pause and say this: I get it's a joke and that people have done these stunts like eating a tub of cheese balls, etc for large crowds to gather for seemingly meaningless activities like eating a lot of food, but in all honesty, is 25 chicken tenders even that much? I think you need to choose a different food group that you can eat more of so it sounds more difficult. Either way, when Friday rolled around, the crowd started filing it. Reports say it got to 200+ people just to watch this guy eat chicken fingers.
Some guy named @btwonmoose started live-tweeting everything going on, which was really helpful for those of us that couldn't make it out to the event. Starting with the supplies, in which our guy made the excellent selection of CANES for his chicken tender of choice:
A victory round is the cockiest thing I've ever seen displayed on a table before a challenge, but he must be really confident, right? He knows he can do it, so he can do whatever he wants to hype it up. Including quite the grand introduction with Eye of the Tiger playing in the background while some guy calls this "the greatest feat ever seen on this campus".
No offense but does he not know that Curt Cignetti's Indiana football Hoosiers are 6-0? Anyways, it was finally time to get down to business and eat. And 14 tenders in, he was feeling good.
At this point you gotta think the kid is golden, right? Just 11 tenders left…vibing with the crowd…all is well. Nope, less than 30 minutes later, Mark……"finished".
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And this is where I have a problem with this story. No, he didn't finish. He lost. And what does the crowd do for failing by 6 tenders, barely even getting past the 3/4 mark of his challenge? They clapped and treated him like a hero. The Participation Trophy Generation like you read about. This man should've been booed into eternity. Forced to transfer from the public shame he receives every time he sets foot on campus. But nope, they'll probably build him a statue outside Assembly Hall. And let me say this: it's a damn shame that Indiana students exposed themselves as soft during this entire ordeal. Not just the kid who said he'd eat 25 but ate 19, but the entire student body that worshipped his failure. I was just started to like the Hoosiers, too. Made a treaty with my good friend White Boy Rick and everything. But now it's back to Ohio State by 4 scores in a few weeks. Cheering for failure???