Connor Stalions Has Been Named HEAD COACH At Detroit Mumford High School After The Previous One Suffered A Mild Stroke

Get the fuck outta here. Obviously thoughts and prayers to coach William McMichael after suffering a stroke, but what are the odds that this would happen just one game in? Don't forget that literally a few weeks ago, Connor Stalions was not even on staff. The news broke on August 16th that he had "landed" the Defensive Coordinator job at Mumford High School in Detroit (shoutout Eddie Murphy), less than a month before the season opener. And not after 1 week of play, he is calling all of the shots. Let me say this and I don't say it lightly: I don't put anything past Stalions. ANYTHING. Is this perhaps all part of his manifesto to rise to the top? Usually I would say no, but then again, the guy literally has a Manifesto. The percent of the population on Earth that have ever had a Manifesto is about 0.000001%, and the only other guy I've heard of was a bad dude. That's all I'm saying.

One other thing I'll say is that if this motherfucker wins this week, I'll.....I'll.....well I'm not going to say I'll eat dog shit out of a red solo cup, I'll tell you that. But he's taking over a team that went 1-8 last year and dropped their opener 47-6 last Friday.

Hey, at least he didn't give up a 50 burger in his debut as D Coordinator! Only 47! But due to that heroic performance, they have decided to boost him role of Head Coach with the other man needing to step away. And they have Hamady High School tonight, who won 32-16 vs the powerhouse at East English Village Prep last week. But fear not, Mumford fans. This guy has proven he knows how to turn around a program all by himself.

I wonder how long it takes for his presence to be felt across the Detroit Public League? I want one of these graphics at the end of the season. Wait, let me take out my notebook and put it on my To Do List to remake this after the high school football season. That will go viral for sure, people loveeee talking Stalions.

Let me say this: if you don't like my Stalions blogs now, don't check the website tomorrow morning. Because I'm purchasing NFHS or whatever is needed to watch this game and give a full recap on this very blog afterwards. GO HAMADY!