Be The Change: Matt Rempe Is Bringing Violence Back To Hockey By Teaching Boxers How To Fight On Ice

When Matt Rempe came into the league last year, he immediately turned the clocks back to the early 2000s. The days where every team had a heavyweight fighter on the roster, and every game had at least two massive fights go down. The game has gotten softer since those days, and fighting was becoming more and more rare in the game. Apparently "talent" and "skill" were being prioritized by general managers when building a roster as opposed to "beating the everliving shit out of your opponents". 

But for the first time in a long time, teams were signing goons to the roster for the sole purpose of Matt Rempe being on their upcoming schedule. Not only did the New Jersey Devils sign Kurtis MacDermid last year just because Rempe was coming up on the schedule, but they signed him to a 3-year deal since Matt Rempe is in the same division. 

Eventually all other 31 teams around the league are going to need to find someone to answer the bell against Rempe. So instead of just waiting around, Matt Rempe decided he'll just train his own opponents by teaching a boxing club in Alberta how to fight on ice. The "Matt Rempe Academy for Fighters Who Can’t Skate Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too". 

The last thing you'd want to see is one of your middle 6 forwards who actually contributes offensively go on LTIR for a few weeks after getting bashed around by this mutant on the ice. So instead of sacrificing a guy who can actually play, you can just pick a dude out of this boxing club to suit up every time your team plays the Rangers to give Rempe a tilt at center ice. 

Giphy Images.

And who knows--maybe one of these guys will be lucky enough to have a puck bounce off their skate and in the back of the net. Maybe they'll win a scrap or two. Maybe they'll pick up a couple secondary assists. Before you know it, they'll be signing a 3-year contract worth $3.5 million. I'm sure that's more than any of these guys are going to make in the boxing ring.