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Not To Be A Debbie Downer, But Chicago Bears Fans Will NEVER Learn, and Caleb Williams Is Going To Be A Bust Of Epic Proportions

Oh Chicago Bears fans. Will you ever learn? 

It seems like just yesterday we were slurping up the kool-aid that Ryan Pace stirred up for everybody, mortgaging the Bears' future, trading UP to draft Mitch Trubisky. Let's not even get into the whole issue of him ignoring the pro-day and overlooking a kid named Patrick Mahomes altogether, let's look at how that turned out. 

A few inept coaches and wasted seasons later, it was right back to square one, cutting bait and once again blowing everything up, and blowing another top-eleven pick on Justin Fields. 

Everyone vividly remembers the Justin Fields hysteria. It's still fresh. Many, myself included, didn't want to see him traded and given up on, thinking that he was just starting to find his groove and getting the pieces around him to begin developing. But Ryan Poles and co. have jobs to worry about so they're AGAIN, blowing everything up, by dealing Fields to Pittsburgh, and drafting Vince Young 2.0, Caleb Williams tonight. 

Giphy Images.

Leading the charge, doing his best David Koresh impersonation, is our very own Dan Katz. 

Then you've got the rest of the Chicago gang, Eddie, Dave, and Chief, fully convincing themselves that THIS is the guy. THIS is the draft. THIS time it's different.

It's fucking insanity.

It's like watching a battered wife, with two black eyes, her leg in a cast, and her arm in a sling, hobble up out of the hospital bed and into the arms of her piece of shit, wife beating, husband, against your protests. "He's changed", she tells you for the hundredth time, as you set your watch to the next time you'll be visiting her in the hospital. 

At some point, you can't even feel bad for them anymore. 

That's the point I've reached with these people. 

Giphy Images.

They're not even delusional. They're deranged. 

The road from college to the NFL is littered with the shattered dreams of rookie quarterbacks, and Caleb Williams, with all his collegiate glory, has zero idea what he's in for. 

Can he sling the football? Absolutely.

But that's the PAC-12 we're talking about. Not the NFL, not the NFC North, and most certainly not the Chicago Bears.

In reality, we're going to see a lot more plays that look like this from him

Jail breaks where he tries to do too much and learns the hard way, he's not in SoCal anymore.

Sorry but not sorry.

But that's a fact seeing as he's headed to a team that has turned quarterback busts into an art form. 

(Sidebar- I wrote this last year but I stand firmly behind the belief that had the Chicago Bears drafted Patrick Mahomes, and not the QB whisperer Andy Reid and KC, then he's probably out of the league or in a body cast right now, and not slingin Subway foot-longs, challenging TB12 for goat status.)

(Sidebar 2a- can you fucking imagine if this had happened and Jackson Mahomes were here? There is no doubt in my mind that him and Jussie Smollet would have combined forces and that "incident" in Maga country Streeterville would have been a 2-on-2 fake assault.)

Back to Caleb…

Williams's prospects look less like a clear runway and more like a minefield. The question isn't whether Williams has the skill; it's whether he can translate that skill while dodging the 300-pound missiles in the form of defensive linemen, especially behind the Bears' notoriously flimsy line.

"BUT THE BEARS IMPROVED THEIR OFFENSIVE LINE ISSUES IN THE OFFSEASON!" The delusional Bears fans scream. 

Yah, by signing one decent starter, and a couple practice squad warriors who don't have a full season of starts to their three names combined, you're right. In the same way stopping a shotgun blast to the skull is "improved" by bleeding out. 

This kid is going to be running for his life from day 1.

Chicago’s offensive line has been less of a shield wall and more of a welcome mat in recent seasons. Last year, they allowed 58 sacks, ranking them third-worst in the league. For a rookie quarterback like Williams, who needs confidence and time to adjust to the NFL's speed, this is a nightmare scenario. Historical data suggests that rookie quarterbacks sacked 50 times or more in their debut season typically see a steep decline in performance and, often, career longevity.

Quarterbacks like David Carr and Tim Couch, who faced similar onslaughts as rookies, never recovered from their brutal welcome to the NFL.

Look at Bryce Young, the Carolina Panthers' rookie quarterback. During his 2023 season, he was sacked 62 times in 16 games, making him the second-most sacked rookie quarterback in NFL history. Young has said that his "lack of protection and weapons made his rookie season difficult". 

Gee, you think?

As for receivers, I think the Bears are actually as close to stacked, without actually being stacked, heading into this season. HOWEVER, as Stephen Chea would say, stats don't lie. And last season Bears receivers were ranked 28th in drop rate and 26th in yards after catch (YAC), two stats that can cripple a quarterback's effectiveness and confidence. A low YAC not only stunts offensive drives but also places extra pressure on a quarterback to be perfect.

With a drop rate hovering around 7% for his collegiate career, Williams will find converting third downs more challenging than expected.

The transition from college to the NFL is akin to switching from chess to speed chess while blindfolded. The game is faster, the players are smarter, and the hits are harder. For Williams, adapting to this new pace will be critical. He must quicken his decision-making without sacrificing accuracy. A tall task. 

The mental load of leading an NFL team, learning a complex playbook, and reading faster, more intricate defenses can overwhelm even the most promising talents.

And that's for somebody who's mentally strong we're talking about. Not somebody who literally cries in their mother's arms after defeat. 

I really try to be positive and not be the turd in the punch bowl at the party. Nobody can stand that guy. Debbie downer's suck.

I really, honestly, truly, genuinely hope I AM DEAD WRONG on this whole thing. I hope Caleb Williams is the second coming of C.J. Stroud and he fucking kills it next season and takes the Bears to the playoffs. Seriously. There's not much better then this city when the Bears are exciting and give the city hope. 

But again, I've snapped. 

What sealed the deal for me was watching his interview with Ryan Clark this week. 

For a guy with this much self-confidence, coming to a city and organization that has perfected the art of destroying quarterbacks confidence, the writing is on the wall. It's a recipe for disaster. Had the Bears snagged a veteran QB to play in front of Williams for a season or two, to develop him and take off a shit ton of the pressure, like big brother to the North, the Green Bay Packers, have written the book on, I think his chances would be infinitely better. But this isn't Green Bay, and this isn't the Packers. 

Quinn Harris. Getty Images.

p.s. - just read this after I finished but my guy Tate nailed this blog. It's a fucking insane asylum around here. No wonder Brandon Johnson is our mayor.