You Won't Believe It, But This Woman Who Wheeled In An Actual Dead Person To Sign Off On A Loan Was Denied By The Brazilian Bank

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Ah the ol' "trust me this will work, I've seen it in a movie" move. Somebody watched Weekend at Bernie's and had themselves a nice little epiphany yesterday. Person you know dies, immediately take them to the bank and have them sign off on a loan. How could it fail? 

(Daily Mail) Bank employees started filming the pair and ended up calling for an ambulance and police as she used her hand to keep the deceased pensioner's head upright and told him: 'Uncle, are you listening? You have to sign it. I can't sign for you.'

Footage showed the woman telling the dead man to grip hold of his pen hard as she placed it between his fingers and encouraged him to sign a piece of paper at the bank branch in Bangu, a neighbourhood in the western area of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

Lucky for the bank, they hired themselves some real detectives who wouldn't get a fast one pulled on them. Not gonna get a dead guy by them. (Blurred video here if you kinda wanna see a dead guy) 

A bank worker witnessing the scene told the woman : 'I don't think this is legal. He doesn't look well. He's very pale.'

She replied: 'He's like that' before she told the dead OAP: 'If you're not well, I can take you to hospital. Do you want to go back to hospital again?' 

How about the woman dropping a "he's like that" as they questioned the corpse that was in front of them? She came prepared for any and all variables thrown her way. Unfortunately that answer simply wasn't good enough for the bank to hand her over a little over $3,000.

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Yes, that's right. She wheeled in a dead guy to sign off on a loan for just north of $3k!! Obviously all of this is immoral, but even if you're desperate and down to your last option, you gotta be chasing a six figure number to resort to propping up a deceased person and pretending they're alive. On the other hand maybe she thought because it wasn't so much that they wouldn't bother questioning it? 

Thankfully, this woman got what she deserved and was promptly arrested at the scene. The dead person was sadly pronounced dead. 

Paramedics called to the scene confirmed that the deceased pensioner, Paulo Roberto Braga, 68, had passed away a few hours earlier. The woman who wheeled him into the bank, Erika de Souza Vieira Nunes, was arrested at the scene and told police she was his niece as well as his carer.

You have to wonder if Ohtani only used this Brazilian bank for his money, does Ippei get away with stealing tens of millions from him? If they spotted the dead guy here and stopped this woman in her tracks, not sure they fall for the "I'm Shohei Ohtani please give me millions of dollars" trick. Good on Brazil, didn't know they had it in them.