Phillies Save Both Easter And The Season By Simply Not Getting Swept At Home By The Braves
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(Splash Bros? Nope,. Sorry, Thems the Wet Bandits last season, now, and forever.)
THE PHILLIES HAVE RISEN THANK GOD/CHRIST/INSERT HERE WHATEVER WORKS!!!
Look, it's been a rough start for the Phillies. Again. For the 3rd straight season, the Phillies dropped at least their first 2 games of the year. Yes, they made the WS and NLCS in those years, but after the embarrassing shart show that was the playoff collapse last year, it was a point of emphasis for The Fightins to start out at least, you know, average this season. Especially at home against the Braves.
So naturally the Phillies drop the first two games by giving up a million runs on a zillion hits. Not ideal. Espically after Wheeler gives you a shutout gem effort in the opener, you lose, and then Nola gets creampied in his first start under a megadeal in Game 2. It's cool tho. 2 games out of 162 is nothing. So what do you do when Aaron Nola gets shelled after giving up a 2-run homerun to the friggin' 2-hole hitter to lead off the game? You give the nod to the man who did not give up a single run the entirity of Spring Training who also has absolutely owned the Braves the past few season...BIG BALLS RANGER SUAREZ...
...who also promply gives up a 2-run homerun to the friggin' 2-hole hitter to lead off the game. Actually unbelievable. But kudos to Ranger for settling in and giving a worthy 5-inning, 3-run effort. But more kudos to the clutch, 2-out hitting by Schwarber (sweet eadoff dinger, too), Trea, and Bohm sparking that rally to finally put the Phillies ahead late in the game. Shit, let's even give kudos to the bullpen and Hoffman, Strahm, Seranthony for only giving up 1-run, 1-pitch Soto, and Alvarado for shutting shit down (even tho the final out was LACED to Castellanos). We'll take whatever we can get.
First W of 160. Not the worst Easter. In fact, I don't think Georgia Peach Big T has ever had a nice Easter. But that's what happens when you dip out on your savior during the most important day in your religion to head to a baseball game. Such is life. May Big T rise once again as this was very fun.
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*Braves went onto win the World Series later that season. As did the Astros who opened up against the Phillies the next season. And the Rangers who did the same last year. All not as fun.
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3 down, 159 to go. Long season. But dammit, it feels good to finally Ring That Damn Bell.