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Shoutout To This Dog Rescue Shelter For Saving Pups & Roasting The Shit Out Of Me In The Process

This morning I got a text from Kenjac asking if I'd seen the dog they named after me 'at the dog rescue place lol'. 

I had not, nor did I have a clue what he was talking about, but have to admit I felt so immediately flattered that I overlooked the telltale "lol" he put at the end. More on that in a moment. But yes, turns out Waldo's Rescue Pen in NYC saved 36 pups & named them after Barstool employees in honor of Dave & Miss Peaches:

Having a sandwich or a sex position named after me would be neat, but a sweet lil pup?! How cool! I couldn't wait to post her on social media hoping maybe someone would want Barstool Kate in their forever home.

I went to their website, waldosrescue.org, and excitedly scrolled around for her. Soon I came across some familiar fellas:

And a couple adorable gals:

But where was I? 

Which beautiful little puppy would be m……. oh COME ON.

Initially I wondered why someone at a random dog rescue shelter 1,000 miles seemed to hate me, but then I looked into those tired, soulful, (slightly crusty) lil' eyes and knew I was looking directly at my own reflection. 

The white, frazzled hair, senior age bracket, eccentric style, a touch of anxiety… We are but one in the same. 

Were I not tied up in Chicago with two children, a cat, severe early onset osteoporosis, and a tiny townhouse with 10,000 stairs, she'd already be here scooting her hemorrhoids across the rug while I tossed Preparation H on mine. We'd look at each other and laugh and laugh. Soul mates. I haven't said this in a long, long time, but now I can say "I love Barstool Kate". 

If you're in the NYC area and happen to have a cozy spot in your home for a gentle old gal who deserves all the love, she's the one for you. (Neither of us smoke anymore so that shouldn't be an issue in the house.) If you are the lucky one who winds up with her, I will gladly hook you up with some merch & top tier pup treats in return for an occasional photo update. They have a ton of other wonderful dogs to check out, too, & some events coming up where you can meet them. 

Godspeed, sweet Kate, Godspeed.