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EXPERTS HAVE SPOKEN: Mississippi Is Officially Voted As The WORST State In All Of America

Does anyone know what the outline below is?

Shutterstock Images.

If you don't, Eddie will come tap you on the head because you're a fucking RE…moron. In the end it's probably fine though, as not everyone has a basic grasp of elementary geography. 

Especially not the people of Mississippi: Per - aka the first Google hit that really hammered home my narrative - Mississippi ranks 50th out of 51 states + DC in education. 

Like… their kids can't even read, write or 'rythmatic. At all. 

But that's not what makes Mississippi the worst state in the Union, it's a combination of other factors: 

- Lowest median household income at $44K/home while also being the only state under $50K/ home
- Boring geography and no major cities - their largest city (Jackson) is about the size of fucking Naperville 
- Their flag until 2021

And so on and so forth. It also doesn't have any pro sports teams and their two big universities are mid to under cards year over year against real teams like Bama, LSU, etc. 

So if you were to draft the worst states in the Union, Mississippi has a MAJOR claim at going 1.1, and that's what happened: 


Fair? Completely. Will BFW bitch? Probably, but he'll be yelling into a void because this is just a fact of life like water being wet, me having a goddamn rifle for a right arm, and Chicago sports being pathetic embarrassments. 

Like Joakim Noah said about Cleveland, nobody outside of native Missisippians has ever willingly vacationed to MS. 

Giphy Images.

And it's because there's nothing there worth traveling to. Sure, I've only ventured to the shit-colored beaches of Biloxi for a sole night on the town and haven't ever explored more of that state, but that's by choice. I don't want to ever step foot in that state again as long as I live. Same goes for any other state where incest is one a cliche joke you make at its expense. And Connecticut. Connecticut completely fucking blows too. 

Nevertheless, the snake draft is LIVE. If listening to us systematically dismember different states limb by limb is your thing, tune in  anywhere and everywhere: