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Air Force Employee Gets Busted For Using Classified Information To Impress Girls On A Dating App

Prosecutors say 63-year-old David Franklin Slater, a retired Army lieutenant colonel who held a Top Secret security clearance at US Strategic Command, attended classified briefings on the war in Ukraine from February through April 2022, soon after Russia’s invasion began. Slater then sent this classified information to someone who claimed to be a woman living in Ukraine, according to an indictment. The two communicated via email and through the foreign dating website’s online messaging platform, though the indictment does not identify which one.

Slater was arrested Saturday, the Justice Department said in a news release. CNN could not immediately identify an attorney for him.

The person Slater communicated with, who is identified only as “Co-Conspirator 1,” referred to him as “Sweet Dave” and “my secret agent” in messages, according to the indictment.

David, David, David....you poor, horny, bastard. If it's too good to be true...it is.

It's hard for me to blame him though. You get some smoke Ukrainian chick calling you "my secret agent" and you go from sitting in a cube all day staring at your computer to James Bond over night. David is 63. The girl he was talking to was in her 20s. High risk situation, but if he played his cards right, she could get a green card. Everyone wins. 

Instead of living out his days with a Ukrainian girlfriend, it looks as if he will be living out his days without his Military pension and possibly in prison. All because he was horny. It's our (men everywhere) kryptonite. We can't resist it. Most vulnerable part of the intelligence community is horny guys. 

This should be brought up at the next UN Security Council meeting. We've got a ton of pressing issues. We need plans in place to put guard rails on development of A.I., bioweapons, and...horny dudes. No honey pots going forward. You can't use human intuition against mankind. Beat us on the battlefield, not through exposing a guy who hasn't been laid in the 21st century.