To No One's Surprise, Kelly Stafford Calls Bullshit on the Proposed Ban of Her Husband's Jersey at Ford Field Sunday

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There will be 28 starting quarterbacks in the NFL playoffs. How you'd power rank them is exactly the sort of healthy, harmless debate that will fill countless hours of cable shows and sports talk radio all week.

But if you're ranking the QB spouses, I'm making Matthew Stafford's wife Kelly my No. 1. And with all due respect to the others - probably three of whom I can name - it's not even close. Especially if we're basing our evaluation on whom you'd want to have with you in a metaphorical foxhole as you're heading into an allegorical battle. She's the one you'd want watching your six at all times. Whether it's showing off your Super Bowl ring to her legion of fans:

… or committing ABDW (Assault & Battery with a Delicious Weapon) on your behalf:

Kelly can sip Cosmos out of my canteen any time.

So it's to be expected that when a Detroit fan site decided to organize a ban on her husband's jersey at the Rams-Lions game Sunday night:

… she would have none of it. 

Source - [S]ome fans are calling for a Matthew Stafford jersey ban at Ford Field at the game this Sunday. Now, Matthew’s wife, Kelly, is responding. …

She usually comments on stuff like this. She replied in the comments section, “Well this is sad because it’s the completely opposite of how we feel about this city, but Matthew has always been the bigger person and will continue to be that. Praying for an incredible game with zero injuries.”

She then added on her own podcast:

“I think walking in there, the support that that city gave us on some of the hardest times of our lives will be my immediate feel.

“I think there’s gonna be an overwhelming feeling of just gratitude, and it’s gonna suck because I’m not there to support that team that day. And, that’s not gonna be easy, because again, I don’t know a city that rallies behind people like Detroit does. I don’t know if there is one, and it’s a hard place to not put all your heart into. And so, that’s gonna be really hard.”

Listen to her, Lions fans. Not just because she is wise. Not merely because she's offering the kind of support any man would dream of getting from his significant other. But because she's trying to save the city they called home from a fate worse than death:

Embarrassment. 

I get that the axiom "Act like you've been there" doesn't apply. It's been seven years since Detroit has made the playoffs, and 30 since they hosted one. But that doesn't mean they can be forgiven for weak sauce like a Jersey Ban. This is supposed to be a major market. With a proud tradition in the four major sports. This is the action of a backwards, jerkwater, podunk expansion town. The kind of city where the local news anchor refers to the team as "we" while sending it to the sports guy who explains who the major players are. It's a sign of a garbage culture that doesn't deserve to be a Super Bowl contender. And not the owners of a proud tradition that goes back 90 years and celebrated its first championship in 1935 under coach Potsy Clark. 

Look, the Lions traded Kelly Stafford husband and watched him win a ring in another city. Believe me, in New England we know how that feels. But when Tom Brady came back to Foxboro the following season, the place was lousy with his jerseys. His Patriots one. His Buccaneers one. His Pats one and Bucs one cut in half and sewn together. Because we're proud of the legacy he created here and continue to embrace it. Because that's how winning is done. So be more like us. Be more like Kelly Stafford. Quit worrying about nonsense like fans wearing the $100 jerseys they bought five years ago. Root like a champion Sunday. And marry someone like her.