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Congratulations To The Bengals For Beating Jeff Driskel And The Browns 5th Stringers

Whooooooo careeeeeeees! I cannot believe that this is where we're at as a franchise, but I love every single thing about it. We were able to rest our franchise quarterback, Joe Flacco, for next week's PLAYOFF GAME, while we trotted out Jeff Driskel to face the sorry ass Bengals. Here's what we learned from that experiment:

And when I say 5th stringers, I'm really not even exaggerating. Deshaun, DTR, PJ Walker, Joe Flacco....and now Jeff Driskel. Plus, since we rested our starters, and our starters are actually our backups since everyone else is hurt, they really beat a peewee squad today. But credit to the Bengals for finding a way to shut us down! They haven't been able to beat the Browns but once in the last seven meetings, so this was a big win for them. Whatever. That's enough about this game. The only highlights were:

1. Jake Browning's Girlfriend 

2. Joe Mixon celebrating hitting his incentive with a money touchdown dance

End of game. Nothing else notable.

Anyways, looks like the Jaguars completely choked over there against the Titans today? And honestly the last 6 weeks of the season, which means we'll play at Houston next week. Didn't we just wax these motherfuckers on Christmas Eve? Ah, yes, I remember… 

Yes, I'm aware that CJ Stroud didn't play and no, I'm not nervous. Our defense is the best in the league and CJ Stroud can't stop Joe Flacco. The only issue I have is that I think it's a damn shame that we have the 2nd most wins in the AFC right now and we have to head on the road in Week 1, but I'm not too upset when I remember this:

I cannot wait for Joe Flacco to take this city on a Super Bowl run. I'm sitting here on my couch diagramming it now. What I'm really hoping for is that whoever loses tonight's Dolphins vs Bills games then goes on a run, so we can be the #5 seed hosting that #6 seed in the AFC Championship. But then again, an upset like that means Flacco won't get to go to Baltimore and win there. Ugh. Not sure what path I want to this Super Bowl when there's so many great options.