It Turns Out Tommy DeVito DID Show Up At The New Jersey Pizzeria He Reportedly Wasn't Going To Appear At Because Of A Money Issue And He Showed Up For FREE
What, you thought Tommy DeVito was going to bail on an appearance at a local pizzeria and tarnish his good name over 10 boxes of ziti? Fuck outta heeeeeeere! Marty blogged about everything after this tweet went up on Elon's Twitter, which has never told a lie or stretched the truth.
You know what we call the guy who tweeted that? A mamaluke. You know who we don't listen to on the internet, in person, or anywhere else they talk? Mamalukes.
Tommy DeVito is just a local kid that has been riding this magical Italiansanity rollercoaster for a month now with his family and an agent that dresses in pinstripe suits with a fedora fresh off being inducted into the Italian-American Sports Hall of Fame. They know the number 1 rule of New Jersey more than any other group of people in the universe:
You can bail on an appearance at a bar, a memorabilia store, or at MetLife Stadium for John Mara himself. But you never, EVER bail on a pizza parlor. That's Day 1 Jersey stuff for anybody, let alone someone that plans to spend as much of his career playing for the Giants as possible.
Instead you show up, smile while acting like old-fashioned sodas taste good, then head home after your agent collects the check. Or in Tommy's case, do it for free because even though things can get spicy when Italians are negotiating, it always ends with smiles, hugs, and kisses. All in a day's work for New York's QB1 and an Italian Hero.
