I like to think I have an eye for fashion and that extends to football uniforms. Every year for the Army Navy game since 2016, each school drops an alternate uniform and each year Army puts a beat down on the uniform matchup. Am I biased? Of course but I take an objective look at the uniforms each year.
Objectively, I can confidently say that even without seeing Army's uniforms for this year, Army wins the uniform matchup again. To be fair, let's take a look at the uniforms.
So it's, um, blue. Super dark navy blue. That's it. It's monochromatic and pretty simple. For this reason I will say - it's not bad. To be clear, it stinks. It is not going to make anyone stop in their tracks and think, "wow that's a cool uniform" but I won't say it's bad. Compared to some of their past uniforms it is definitely a step in the right direction but it won't win any awards.
One part is so so so bad though and that is the helmet.
There is a designer at Under Armor who went to a carnival as a kid, saw an airbrushed t-shirt, and has been in a love affair with air brush ever since. These helmets look cheesy and they've done the airbrushed thing many times now. Honestly, air brush doesn't belong anywhere near a football uniform. It's horrible.
The entire uniform feels uninspired and maybe that is because of what they are honoring. From the website, "The entire uniform is flooded with Eclipse Navy (UA’s darkest shade of navy blue) to mimic the covert design of a submarine hull." In the history of the navy, no one has a favorite submarine. Rather, they look up to the many brave sailors who served on submarines. Why not tell their story? Instead they are telling the stories of submarines as opposed to the submariners. Don't get me wrong, submarines are definitely cool but this game isn't about machines. It's about the men who play in the game so why not tell the story of the men who came before those on the field.
Ultimately I feel bad for the players and the boat school alum because they have to pretend to be excited about these uniforms when in reality the only thing to be excited about is that they aren't horrible. They feel like someone forget the assignment was due so they put it together last minute.
There, that is me being objective - they just aren't horrible. They are one level above horrible which I suppose is spot on because of the depths that submarines patrol.
I look forward to seeing Army's uniforms this week. Thank God we have Nike behind us.