Hollywood Robbed Us Of A Space Jam Spinoff With Tony Hawk Called Skate Jam
The world was robbed of a Space Jam follow up, but instead of featuring basketball, the movie would star Tony Hawk and be called Skate Jam. Tony Hawk dropping into a half pipe with Bugs and the gang? Sign me up. As a guy who can't even do a simple ollie, I'm all in on this movie. What kid from the 2000's who played the Tony Hawk video games wouldn't go see this movie? Big Hollywood studios don't care about what the people want. According to Tony Hawk the studio execs nixed Skate Jam when Brendan Fraser's 2003 movie Looney Toons Back In Action didn't perform well at the box office.
Kids don't give a shit about Brendan Fraser and Steve Martin hanging out with the Looney Toons. Kids DO want to see Daffy Duck grind a rail with one of the coolest dudes in the world, Tony Hawk. Skate Jam has all the potential in the world. Wile E. Coyote chasing the Roadrunner through a skate park only to look down and realize the Roadrunner has led him off a massive half pipe, and is now doing an 80 foot vert drop, that's a damn movie! Instead we got another basketball Space Jam in 2021 with Lebron James and a toned down, not hot, frumpy Lola Bunny. NOT MY AMERICA. What's next? Getting rid of Nala from the Lion Kings "fuck me eyes"?
I'm getting angry at Warner Brothers as I sit here and type this blog. What a total fucking miss. All the cool shit the animators could have done with Tony Hawk on a skateboard.

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If you're bored this weekend watch the Tony Hawk HBO doc: Until The Wheels Fall Off. The documentary is phenomenal and proves that Tony Hawk is the definition of a LEGEND. Hawk was dominating the competition as a kid, but even as an old guy, he's still got it. Hawk was 48 years old during the filming of the doc and attempts to pull off his signature 900. It's honestly insane to think that at 48 a dude is dropping into a half pipe and putting his body through all the collisions, but Hawk just keeps falling down and getting right back up.
I thought Tom Brady sitting in the pocket at 45 YEARS OLD and getting destroyed by d-linemen while seeming relatively unfazed was one of the more impressive feats of athleticism and determination, but then I watched the Tony Hawk doc (fuck that rolls off the tongue well) and I have to say a 48 year old man flying through the sky, missing a landing, and taking a bad bounce off plywood or sometimes missing the half pipe and hitting concrete is the definition of insanity. Can't recommend the doc enough. Come to see the life story of Tony Hawk, stay to see a 48 year old man do the unexplainable.