Investigative Journalism: Was This Eagles Coach Wearing A Thong On The Sideline?
When KaVontae Turpin was hit out of bounds a few minutes into the 3rd quarter of tonight's matchup between the Eagles and Cowboys, he took a few extra bodies down with him. One of those bodies happened to be an Eagles staffer on the sideline. And upon getting up from the ground, it appeared as if this particular member of the coaching staff was whale tailing harder than the chick wearing white pants in Superbad.
It's 10:33.
Now the last time I checked, we lived in America. And in America, you are innocent until proven guilty. We can't go around just saying this dude got caught wearing a thong on the sideline without any evidence to back up those claims. We need to lay out a series of facts here to back up our claims and come to a final conclusion So with that being the case, let's do some digging here and address the facts.
Matt Leo is the member of the Eagles coaching staff in question here. He is the defensive and football operations assistant for the Philadelphia Eagles. He spent the past few seasons here as a part of the practice squad before being named to the coaching staff. Originally he's from Australia, and before resurrecting his football career after college he went into the plumbing trade.
All of this is to say that Matt Leo is a guy who is clearly comfortable in the Eagles locker room, he's from a different country where they do things a little differently, and he's used to having his ass crack show out of his pants a little bit. Is this definitive proof that my man was whale tailing? Is this enough to make it more plausible than not that he was, indeed, wearing a thong as opposed to that just being a playbook of sorts stuffed into the back of his pants? I think it does. I think this tells us everything that we need to know, and that this case has been put to rest. Matt Leo was wearing a thong on the sideline, and clearly it got the job done. Eagles get the dub, they move to 8-1, and maybe it's all thanks to Matt Leo's lucky thong. If anything, the whole city should be wearing a g-string tomorrow.
Go Birds. Go Matt Leo.