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Will Smith Better Get The Biggest Contract In Baseball History After Winning The World Series 3 Straight Times With 3 Different Teams

Mary DeCicco. Getty Images.

The baseball world is filled with a bunch of dorks who watch the game with calculators and think they've cracked some secret code to winning games. The analytics dorks think that they're gods because they track a stat that maybe 7 other people have ever even heard of before. But guess what, bozos? Turns out the true secret to winning a World Series title is to just pay Will Smith to play baseball for your team. 

3 years. 3 teams. 3 titles. 

Play moneyball all you want. As long as Will Smith exists, none of that matters. You can't argue with the facts. And if you're an MLB owner or general manager this morning, and you're not on the phone with Will Smith's agent all day? Well then that's just gross negligence. 

The man signed a one-year deal with the Rangers right before the season started for $1.5M. You have teams signing guys to damn near half a billion dollars in contracts these days, and turns out a measly $1.5M to Will Smith was the key. 

Phillies owner John Middleton always talks about how he's willing to spend stupid money to bring a World Series back to Philadelphia. What better way to blow through some of that money than to bring Will Smith back to Philly?

NBC. Getty Images.

Do the deal. 

@JordieBarstool