A 20 Person Funeral Party Walked Out On A $542 Restaurant Tab In Houston In What Is Maybe The Greatest Heist Of All Time

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We've had some all-time great heists in history. Pink Panther, the Antwerp Diamond Heist, the Knightsbridge heist, maybe even Saddam Hussein sending his son and personal assistant with a note to a bank governor demanding the hand over of $1 billion. None may be more impressive than this *checks notes* funeral party that ran out on a 20 person tab. Never mind the fact that a $542 tab for 20 people equates to roughly $27 a person after tip. You know how hard it is to walk out with TWENTY people and not get caught? $3 Happy Hour Modelo sounds like the greatest deal on the planet too. You'd be lucky to get that for $10 in NYC. I love the use of the BREAKING tag by Daily Loud too. 

I wouldn't be a Capital J Journalist if I didn't do my due diligence here, so here's a little more info about the heist:

SOURCE: A 20-person funeral party who dined at Crazy Cajun Seafood & Sports in Houston, Texas reportedly dashed on a more than $500 check, then threatened to shoot restaurant staffers who objected, according to a TikTok video on the popular viral video page @grizzyshoodnews.

The restaurant could not immediately be reached for comment. 

“Massive dine n dash! One of the dine n dashers says she will pew pew [a] staff member,” read the text atop the video that has over 1.2 million views since being posted earlier this month.

Apparently, 18 people in the group walked out without paying any of their tabs because they weren’t happy with the 20% gratuity that was added to their bill.

Alright so maybe this wasn't some immensely complex plan to get out of paying the tab and simply just a bill dispute. Here I was thinking that they pulled off one of the greatest schemes in history. Nope. It's just an argument about large parties and if gratuity should be added automatically (the answer is a resounding yes). Whatever. Life was more fun thinking these people had an entire playbook on how to get some free Happy Hour Modelos and Ultimate Ritas to mourn the loss of a loved one. Consider the journalism finished.