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What Do You Do When Your Boss Calls You a Crazy Alcoholic?


Usually, if your boss calls you a crazy alcoholic, you might as well bring a brown box with you to work and pack your things the next day. Fortunately, I'm a "Make-A-Wish" hire who works for Barstool, so I have privileges that most people don't. For the record, I'm not an alcoholic; I'm a product of my environment. I jumped off the porch at 14 years old. Growing up in South Florida is different. While typical 14-year-olds are playing two-hand touch football in the street, I was downtown Fort Lauderdale, showing the bouncer an ID belonging to a 29-year-old named Raymond Santos, and it worked every single time. 

It's time for someone to come out and say it: You are NOT an alcoholic if you only drink on the weekends. That's what weekends are for. I'm sure there comes a time in everyone's life when that changes, but as a 24-year-old stallion, there's no way I'm hanging 'em up just yet.

But Dave is right, I was shit faced. What did you expect though? You don't tailgate with Bills Mafia and drink water. These mother fuckers drink. You might as well spit in their face before you turn down a drink. I got to the tailgate at 6:30AM and they already had shots lined up. What do you want me to do? Not take them? Fuck that, I wanted all the smoke.


I'm far from finished. 

I also ended my friendship with Big Cat and Jersey Jerry.

IIt breaks my heart that the two people I hold closest to my heart had the nerve to fade my team knowing I was going to the game. If you're going to fade my team, at least check in. If Big Cat or Jerry had just texted me, "Hey Smokes, I hate to say it, but I love the Bills this Sunday. I'm going to Nuclear Missile them," there wouldn't have been an issue. I just wanted a courtesy text. Imagine if Jerry finally gets the green light to go to a Steelers game, and I nuclear missile the other team? It wouldn't sit right with him. Jerry took me out to dinner on my birthday. I'll never forget the little things. I might be from a younger generation, but there's nothing I value more than loyalty. Jerry was like a brother to me, and he stabbed me in the back. I don't handle betrayal well; it makes me lash out.

I was dead serious. I don't let people in my circle but once they do it's a forever thing. There's nothing I wouldn't do for my boys or future wife but the respect has to be mutual and I felt disrespected. Big Cat and Jerry were 100% weasel rats for betting the Bills, but they're not weasel rat human beings. So for that I apologize. I am willing to have my boys back, this is a we not me thing. You're only as strong as your weakest link, and whether you want to admit it or not, I'm the best weakest link in the country.

Ball is in your court.