Advertisement

Tyreek Hill Wants To Live A Quiet, Normal Life After He Retires ... Wait, Nope. He Says He's 'Very Serious About Wanting To Be A Porn Star'

This right here is how you plan for retirement. Worry about saving money, staying out of trouble, living a quiet life? None of that after years in the public eye. Go fuck on camera. I mean I want to be as surprised as Mike Evans here, but it's Tyreek Hill. Dude is weird, I don't know how else to explain it. Can't lie, you know Dolphins fans are clicking the instant a Tyreek Hill post-retirement porn comes out. That's especially true if they keep winning games. 

Here's my very novice advice. Embrace the Cheetah nickname if you get into porn. I'm not quite sure how pro athletes fuck, but if it's anything like the normal person you might be a little fast. Well if you go by Cheetah, it's just expected then. Hell, make it your thing. Become the fast cum guy who was a former NFL player turned porn star. Niche market but people still care about niches. You'll win over even more Dolphins fans probably. 

There's plenty that you can do. Throw up the deuces celebration. Do the waddle after the scene ends. Do you flip after it ends. I'm not exactly sure how to map it out but I'm not a director. I'm simply a blogger who saw NFL and porn. Makes me start to think who would he pair up with. Only one man who can answer that: 

Wait, not Eddie or the Porn King. But the big man Clem. Look at his history with this! 

Advertisement

Either way, Tyreek Hill wants to be a porn star. Not an announcer. Not a coach. A porn star. What's life without dreams?