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Joe Burrow Sucked So Much Ass Against The Browns He Immediately Got A New Haircut To Get Rid Of The Bad Juju

This is a great move and something I feel important to alert the masses. The Bengals are a prime betting team this week, I'm sure everyone will be on them. Game back at home, coming off a complete ass kicking by the Browns and now a Joe Burrow haircut. Everyone knows the key to look good, play good is a new haircut. Even if you're a baldy, you gotta get a fresh cut the day before a game and feel that beautiful skin melting in the sun. 

At least Burrow is self-aware here. He knows he sucked ass against the Browns. He knows he had to do something and a haircut was step 1. Sure, maybe help get Tee Higgins some catches. Maybe the defense will show up a bit more. There's plenty that can be improved for the Bengals, but step 1 was the haircut. 

This is also such a Joe Burrow moment. The people in Cincinnati go fucking bananas for this guy and to the point that you have to ask him about a haircut. Hard hitting journalism. This is how you get to the deep issues with the Bengals and help bounce back against a rival. I have no idea if it's even a good haircut or if it matters to anyone, but it's a haircut game now against Lamar. I'd personally not suck ass in week 1 every year, but why let facts get in the way of looking good.