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Start Planning The Parade: Dog The Bounty Hunter Is About To Join The Manhunt For The Escaped Pennsylvania Murderer

Scott Olson. Getty Images.

Just about two weeks ago, convicted murderer Danelo Cavalcante escaped from a prison in Chester County right outside of Philadelphia. Ever since then, he has just been running circles around the authorities on the hunt for him. Pretty much every day seems to be the same thing. There's an update that the authorities are closing in on him, about to apprehend the guy, and then he gets away with a new haircut, or a new outfit, or a windowless van, or a rifle. Every day he gets away, and every day he picks up some new toys. 

Well guess what, bitch? Your time is up. Because Dog The Bounty Hunter is about to be on the case, and your ass might be able to run but it sure as shit can't hide from the Dog. 

They say the Dog can have boots on the ground in Pennsylvania as early as this week. The timing here is lining up perfectly for Dog to catch this son of a bitch just in time for the Eagles home opener on Thursday night. 

Imagine this--the Eagles get off to a slow start against the Vikings in the first half. Eagles fans start to get a little restless after the team already had a less-than-inspiring performance in New England on Sunday. All of a sudden the lights go out at Lincoln Financial Field during halftime. As soon as they pop back on, "Dreams & Nightmares" by Meek Mill starts blaring and there at the 50-yard-line is Dog The Bounty Hunter with Danelo Cavalcante. The crowd goes nuts, Dog screams "GO BIRDS", and the Eagles come out and beat the everliving piss out Minnesota 38-7. 

If the Dog captures this bastard AND the Eagles go on to win a Super Bowl this year, then we need to get Dog on one of the parade buses. Let the man speak at the top of the Art Museum steps. 

Go Birds, Go Dog. 

P.S. -- If Dog can't get him, this legend is on the scene to finish the job. 

Check mate.