Power Ranking The 10 Best Things About NFL Sundays Being Back

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This is easily one of the best days of the year. Even with the NFL season going to 18 weeks, it's still much shorter than the other three pro sports. We only get 18 of these Sundays. The first one might be the best. We have optimism and excitement for every fan base. I am one of few people that may love baseball more than football (remember I'm also hundreds of years old) but MLB has nothing even close to an NFL Sunday. It makes the weekends so much better even though the weather gets colder. No matter what is going on in your life, you have something cool to look forward to every single week for the rest of the year. It's perfect.

Here are my ten favorite things about NFL Sundays being back:

10. Those Weird Fox Robots

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I've always been kinda confused by these guys but I'd be lying if I said I didn't smile when I saw them. They seem like odd mascots but FOX getting football at in 1994 was odd as fuck. I can't state enough how wild this was when it happened. Football Sundays were only on NBC and CBS for years. It's safe to say the experiment did work out and now we're in the 30th season of the NFL on FOX. When this happened, I remember people thought it would change broadcasts forever. If you flash forward to 2023, is the FOX telecast that much different than CBS? I kinda wish CBS had more robots.

9. Not Feeling Guilty About Not Being Outside Or Spending Time With Family

NFL Sundays are made for sealing yourself off in your house and devouring hours and hours of football. Beautiful day outside? Fuck you, football is on. Family gathering? Fuck you, football is on. Wake on a Sunday? Can I go to the funeral the next day instead? Also, fuck you. Football is on.

All kidding aside, I think it's mentally healthy to have a day every week when you escape and just watch football. I'm sure everyone reading this has had especially shitty years where having an NFL Sunday was a great oasis at the end of a week. No matter how badly thing are going, it's so helpful having something to look forward to.

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8. Fake Laughing From Pre-Game Hosts

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This is a phenomenon I enjoy much more in September than I do in November or December. By that time of the year, I skip these shows and turn on NFL Red Zone early to hear classic Sam Spence NFL songs. But in these early weeks, it is comforting to see and hear James Brown and Boomer on CBS or Howie Long and Jimmy Johnson on FOX. Them wildly overselling jokes is always intriguing. Do they laugh that hard if they hang out when the cameras are off? If not, why do they feel the need to do this? Do they get mad if someone doesn't laugh like the Joker if someone says something mildly amusing? It's been going on for over 30 years and I left with more questions than answers.

7. Making Chili (or whatever your NFL Sunday go-to meal is)

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Everyone has their own NFL Sunday meal. Chili is the winner for me. I go the supermarket on Saturday and get all the supplies. Then Sunday morning before the games start, I prep and cook everything and throw it on the crock pot. In the break between the 4 PM games ending and the Sunday Night Football game starting, you eat. It's perfect. I can't make this today because I'll be streaming the Sunday Night game at the office but I am already looking forward to this for Week 2.

6. Trying To Make Sense Of The "Waiting All Day For Sunday Night" lyric.

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My close personal friend Mike Francesa is not wrong about the theme song not making sense. I've spent far too much time thinking about it. I suppose if one of your favorite teams are playing on Sunday night, it could have truth behind it? The song is based off Joan Jett's song "I Hate Myself For Loving You" which is a fine song…but they could have picked any song to base the theme around.

It's also horribly cheesy but I enjoy the weird forced lyrics that specify the teams playing that particular night. I can't help myself.

5. Scott Hanson

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Rico Bosco would not approve of the TV set-up I have in my house. I only have one television so I let Scott Hanson be my guide on NFL Sundays. By the time December rolls around, I feel like he's a close personal friend. I listen to him talk more in those four months than almost anyone else in my life. He's also the only person who makes me feel kinda guilty when I go the bathroom on Sunday.

4. Winning The First Bet Of The NFL Season

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I didn't win anything on Thursday so this one might be for me and me alone. But winning a football bet always makes me feel like I am some kind of guru. I imagine that Bill Parcells, Bill Cowher and Bill Belichick are all in awe of my NFL prowess. Am I some time traveler or just that brilliant and astute? If I have a couple winning weeks in a row, it's easy to start feeling like you are a couple breaks away from being the next Vince Lombardi.

(Remember, this is all coming from the person who went 0 for 5 on Thursday night. Let me enjoy my victories when I get them.)

3. Tracking Your Fantasy Football Teams

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Nothing says NFL Sunday like hundreds of tabs open on the laptop because you are in way too many fantasy football leagues. It's too hard to say no and even harder to leave one you are already in. Don't even know most of the people in a specific league? That doesn't matter. Once 1:05 rolls around, seeing all of tabs open makes your fantasy football interest end up like a Communist government. I'm just as happy when someone in my league with a $25 buy-in scores a TD as I am when someone in my "2nd mortgage" league runs one in. Spending way too much time wondering about 3rd string running backs has become more of a Sunday tradition than church or 60 Minutes.

2. The Witching Hour

I am speaking specifically about the 1:00 games witching hour. The 4 PM one is a pathetic sequel in line with Speed 2: Cruise Control. There just aren't enough games.

But when 3 PM rolls around and these games start to get closer to the 4th quarter, few things are better in sports. Nothing gets the pulse racing when you have 3 or more close games at once and Scott Hanson sounds like he's been popping adderall (to go along with whatever magical brand of Immodium A-D he takes so he doesn't shit).

1. Hope

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The very best thing about Week 1 is we are in the playoff hunt. Some teams like the Texans or Cardinals might have one hell of a road but who knows? No one expected the 2001 Patriots to do anything. The whole reason we are sports fans is hope. 31 of 32 teams are going to end the season in some level of disappointment. Only 3% of us are going to get what we want.

But today? We all have a shot. I'm a Jets fan. They haven't even been to the playoffs in 12 fucking years. Every season, I was able to trick myself into thinking…maybe? The reality is too much to bare. Hope is what makes sports fun. This year, the Jets seem to have an actual chance. But if they go 8-9 and miss the playoffs?

I'll still be on the couch next year smelling that chili cook, watching Scott Hanson…and believing that maybe…just maybe…this is the year.