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The 'Hottest Cop' Says She's Blocked From Tinder for Being Too Good to Be True

You work in this often Rated R world of blogging long enough, and pay attention hard enough, and over time you start to see some patterns emerge. One of them is perhaps the oldest trick in the Instagram model book. And that is to declare yourself "Too" something. Too anything, practically. Claim that you're a victim of anti-beauty discrimination of some sort, and you'll get the sort of name recognition all the over-the-shoulder poses, gratuitous yoga pants buttshots and inspirational messages over Golden Hour bikini photos will never bring.

Just claim you're "Too sexy" for this. "Too hot" for that. Or in the case of the woman who shot her shot at Tom Brady last December, "Too Dangerous For Social Media" itself:

So you'd think by now we'd all stop falling for it. For this sort of manipulation. This cynical misuse of superlatives, just to garner attention. And I think we all should. 

Just not right now. Because another thing you learn in this business is that sometimes knowsingly allowing yourself to be scammed is simply doing your job. This is one of those times.

Source - As a police officer, she was tasked with lock-up. Now, she’s found herself locked out. 

Adrienne Koleszar, an Instagram model who once described herself as the “hottest cop” in Germany, says Tinder has banned her account because they believe she is fake.

“I didn’t do anything other than just looking and swiping through the pictures,” Koleszar told CEN-T4. “I have no idea why my account was then blocked.”

Koleszar, 38, gained 520,000 followers on her Instagram account after posting dangerously sexy photos of herself on social media in 2016. 

Her content was so lethal it ended her career as an officer in Dresden, Germany. …

Tinder rejected her profile twice, claiming the account impersonated herself.

Blah, blah, blah. Who cares what the reason was? The important thing is that there are gentlemen living in Germany who'd like to cosplay cops and robbers, have a Strip Search fetish, or who would like a high stakes role playing game of Good Cop/Bad Cop who are being denied their basic, fundamental rights by an app that exists solely to promote irresponsible, commitment-free, casual hookups. 

And this is cruel beyond measure. There's something deep in all of us that is sexually attracted to law enforcement. Badge Bunnies are real, and they're not all frauleins

(For the record, I'm talking about real law enforcement. When I was working as a Massachusetts Court Officer, trust me, no one was hiring us to work Bachelorette Parties. Which is a shame. I had a whole routine worked out in my head. I come bursting in carrying a Dunkin's in one hand and The Herald under the other and kick it off with, "Did somebody say … ALL RISE?" But no one ever asked.)

Besides, there's something even more compelling about the sort of naughty, rogue cop that Adrienne Koleszar seems to embody. That rebel who'll throw the book away and go by her gut instincts to get the job done. Dirty Harry. Popeye Doyle. Alonzo Harris. Vic Mackie. Frank Drebin. How can Tinder take that away from the good people of Germany?

Not to mention what it's doing to poor Adrienne, who probably now has to meet men in person before hopping into the sack with them.

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I don't know much about Germany, but I'll guess this is probably the worst miscarriage of justice that's ever taken place in her home country. Free Adrienne Koleszar! Free Adrienne Koleszar! Free Adrienne Koleszar! 

Now, to the rest of you, please stop playing victim and claiming you're "Too" whatever for whatever. I'm onto your game and I'm not falling for it any more.