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Chris "Mets Fan/Living Corpse" Klemmer: Bryce Harper Has A Better Chance Of Hitting 600 Home Runs Than NOT Hitting 500 Dingers

KLEMMER!!! The man went to sleep as a Mets fan/Sloth from Se7en and woke up the most Phillies supporter this side of Frank The Tank. Wait…you thought Frank The Tank was also a NYM die-hard? Well, how the hell do you explain the man having a HAM off with the Phillie Phanatic this week???

Exactly. There are no more Mets fans. Only those who still choose to hate themselves. 

As for Bryce Harper, yeah, he's at 300 home runs at 30-years-old while signed thru the next 40 Olympics. 25 dingers over 8 years gets him to 500. 30 over 10 gets him to 600. He's got 15 home runs this season…with 10(!!!) of them coming in August as his UCL heals. So we'll see. 

Regardless of said dingers, here's to the next decade of great baseball in South Philly courtesy of the greatest man alive.