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Somebody Needs To Say It--You're Not Allowed To Punch Your Players In The Stomach Anymore If You Want To Be A High School Football Coach

You're up 12-0, but Douglas County has the ball and they're driving. If there's one thing we know to be certain about Douglas County football, it's that you can't give them any life. You need to keep your foot on the gas or else they'll make you pay. Next thing you know, your best cornerback gets cooked on the same double move you went over all week in practice. 

Do you...

A) Just chalk it up to high school sports and accept the fact that these are kids who aren't always going to be completely locked in for every single moment of every single game. 

B) Calmly talk to the player about his mistake and maybe go over some adjustments to mentally prepare him for the next play. 


C) Unload a vicious right jab to his stomach while the cameraman is standing right behind you. 

To be perfectly fair, there was a time when C was an acceptable answer. Shoot, I don't even think it was that long ago when you could get away with just a slap on the wrist if you went with option C. Like I'm sure this guy came up in a time when his football coaches would literally beat the shit out of their players just for the fun of it. But as crazy as it may seem, you're not allowed to hit the kids. In fact, it is quite literally against the law. That'll get you fired and most likely arrested. 

So to all the folks out there who think they want to get into coaching high school sports, maybe just keep that in the back of your mind. No punching the players. Seems pretty self-explanatory, but every year there are some people out there who need the reminder.