Phil Mickelson Tells a Wild Story About Stealing Augusta National Property

Ok Phil. We all knew you were a little crazy, but I didn't expect this one. I knew you were a big "disrespect the game of golf" guy when it comes to gambling on your own events (I know he denies that but you can't convince me that's never happened).  But I didn't think you had it in you to steal from Augusta National.

I honestly didn't think anybody would have it in them to fuck with Augusta National. Imagine if a non-green jacket wearing civilian was caught stealing a sign from Augusta. If you so much as show up in the wrong color skin shirt (times have changed) they'll throw you in a secret prison underneath the water on Amen Corner. If they catch you with a sign, they'll make you disappear off the face of the earth. 

Does anybody have these tapes? We're going to need to see the tapes. I'm a little unclear if Phil is saying that there definitely is a tape, or if he was ever actually confronted by someone, but it sounds like he was. I can't blame him though. You win one tournament doing your coveted new towel drill, and you're not about to stop because some ass hole sign is telling you no. Especially after stealing the signed worked perfectly the first year, and he won the Masters as a result. Of course you're going to run the same play the following Masters. 

Although come to think of it, the West Range must have allowed for longer shots right? I know Augusta National isn't failing to provide Masters contestants an adequate practice area to hit full shots. Was the West Range just not good enough for Phil? 

This is entirely unrelated, but the visual of Phil pulling the sign out of the ground reminds me of something I used to do when I played high school golf. I stole an out-of-bounds stake from my home course and put it in my bag. The idea was that if I ever found myself barely on the wrong side of the OB line, I would drop my OB stake on the opposite side of the ball to extend the area of play. I don't think I ever actually had the balls to do it in a match, but I liked having it as an option.

Also, the end of the video where Phil sincerely says that he's not a betting man... very good Phil. He delivered that line with 100% straight faced with zero sense or sarcasm in his voice. A fantastic troll by Phil. Unless he's not trolling at all, and he's rattled by the Ryder Cup gambling accusations and thinks he's going to be able to change the big money gambler narrative he's worked so hard to build over the course of his entire life. Sure Phil, we all believe you.