There's a lot of people on the internet. A lot of people making internet money in a lot of different internet ways. To me, I don't care how someone makes a living online. As long as they aren't doing something illegal or wildly unethical (a little unethical is fine), then I tip my cap to them. Any person who has found a way to coerce the internet into depositing a living wage into their bank account is doing something right.
But of all the weird fucking websites where people make their internet living, I think Cameo has the craziest people. I happen to sit next to the King of Cameo. His name is Frank "The Tank" Fleming. For the last 11 days straight, Frank has been the #1 creator on the site (based on # of videos posted).
I see Frank tweet out his Cameo stats every day. He's very proud, and rightfully so. When he walked into the office this very morning, I heard him loudly ask/announce to the office, "Did you see that my streak is alive?" Obviously we all gave him a standing ovation and threw flowers at his feet. A few minutes after that, Mike Francesca walked into our office. The first person Mike wanted to talk to was Frank. All that is normal here. Getting humbled by Frank on a daily basis is standard procedure at Barstool Sports.
I'm fairy certain Frank makes enough money on Cameo to live off of. I'm not exactly sure how much he nets per video, but it costs $50 for a Frank video, and he's doing 50 of them per day. Those are pretty good numbers. But every time Frank posts his Cameo stats, I notice the other dudes on the list. It's an eclectic bunch. No offense to them, but they don't strike me as the cream of the internet crop. So for this blog I thought I would a little research to find out what these other top Cameo creators are all about. I have a feeling I know what I'm going to find..
CREATOR #2: SUPER HUMMAN
Super Humman was Franks closest competitor yesterday. The internet describes him to me as a "Pro Wrestling Personality". Unfortunately, his Instagram account is private, but luckily a quick Google search yielded this Super Humman related news story.
An interesting development. I also couldn't help but notice that Super Humman's Cameo's are currently closed. I'm assuming that's just something he does when he feels like taking a break. This racia slur article was from 2019. But since his profile is closed, Cameo won't show me how much a Super Humann Cameo costs. Is there an upcharge for slurs? We can't be sure.
He does however have a Twitter account, and boy is it something.
Electric content as they say in the biz. Good for Super Humman I suppose. If body slamming Legos is what pays the bills, then body slam away.
CREATOR #3: ERIC CARTMAN
Eric Cartman. is always on the top Creator's list. Honestly, it's kind of bull shit, because he charges $2 per video. But he's out there grinding none the less.
He appears to only exist on Cameo. Maybe he has an Instagram, but when I search Eric Cartman, I get nothing but accounts posting South Park clips. But based on the 'preview videos' he has posted on his Cameo account, I must admit that I'm wildly unimpressed. You can see for yourself..
Does he sound like Eric Cartman? - No
Does he look like Eric Cartman? - No.
Is he fat and kinda wearing the same clothes as Eric Cartman - Yeah, I guess.
If all it takes to be a successful Eric Cartman Cameo person is weighing 300 pounds and buying a knit hat, then this guy is lucky he was the first one to it. I can't stress enough how bad his Cartman impression is. I give him 1 star out of 10.
CREATOR #4: ANTHONY POLCARI
I really don't like this dude. I don't know if I can put it into words, or if I even have a real reason for hating this guy. But boy do I hate his videos. Just watch his. I dare you to disagree with me.
For starters, I don't trust anybody who lives in Washington D.C. I especially don't trust a "Consultant" who live in Washington D.C. Who the hell are you consulting at a 24 year old in America's capital? I have no idea because your Instagram account doesn't say shit. It's just video after video of how to dress. And your outfits suck. Nobody needs to learn how to wear a shirt and tie. It's very self explanatory. The most troubling thing about this guy is that Hank is following him. Don't do it Hank. Don't hire him. I know he does way more content and better numbers than a majority of our company (including me), but it's not worth it. Please Hank.
CREATOR #5: JAMES BUCKLEY
James Buckley appears to be the most legitimate person on this list so far (other than Frank of course). It appears he was on the comedy series "The Inbetweeners". I've never watched that, but I've have heard of it. I think people enjoy it. So I'm not going to shit on this guy. He has a nice British accent, and he gives me Paddy The Baddy vibes.
CREATOR #6: BRILLIANTLY DUMB
Brilliantly Dumb is a deserving internet person. He does golf content. The first video I saw of him was this video where he's talking up his caddy, Reese. It made me laugh.
He's done much more stuff too, including content with Foreplay. And he's consistently in the Cameo top 10 doing $95 videos. That's respectable.
CREATOR #7: ISAAC H.P.
This gentleman goes by the name Isaac H.P. I'm going to let this video speak for itself. Looks like he's famous for slaying too hard.
CREATOR #7: SHOENICE
I'm starting to notice a trend… Shoenice was a staple of the internet circa 2010. You might know him from my personal favorite Shoenice classic, "Shoenice Eats a Shoe" (spoiler alert, he doesn't eat a real shoe)
CREATOR #9: ENGLISH MAN IN SWANSEA
You shouldn't get to be on Franks top Cameo people list if your videos cost less than $10. Also, being an Englishman in Swansea is nothing to write home about. There's a lot of Englishmen in Swansea. To be honest I thought people in Swansea were all Englishmen. But I guess Wales is supposed to be different than England or something. Who knew. Who cares. Sick vape shop dude.
So that's what we're working with when it comes to top Cameo creators. Glad I looked into that. Congratulations Frank The Tank. You are their king.