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Yeah, That'll Help You Win: Sean Payton Is Banning Players From Wearing Sunglasses And Bucket Hats On The Sidelines During Preseason Games

I know what Sean Payton is trying to do here. Football is life basically. It doesn't matter that it's preseason, we're not acting like preseason. All of the cliches. But, come on. This is the road you're taking to try and rebuild the Broncos? What did bucket hats ever do to cost you games? Maybe it's because I'm a bald man, but bucket hats are key in the summer time. You know what sucks? Having to put aloe on your head because it's peeling. It's a bad look. Bucket hats help keep that sun off of it and my head a nice tan color instead of red. No one wants to see that. 

You know what people - especially starters - don't really give a shit about? Preseason games. The goal is simple for them. Don't get hurt. That's it. Get through preseason without an injury so you're ready to go for games that matter. It seems like a miracle when teams even play starters, especially in the first preseason game. 

The interview part? Fine. That seems reasonable. You don't want guys on the sidelines not paying attention and doing an interview where they can say whatever. But why wage war against hats and sunglasses? What if they have sensitive eyes and are looking right into the lights? Think about that, Sean? 

Just take a look around the league though. How many of these old-school, my rules are the only way type coaches are successful? They ain't winning that much anymore. Shit, you have Mike Vrabel actually doing the smart thing and having an assistant try out to be a head coach: 

Payton should stick to just making fun of Nathaniel Hackett.