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The New Super Olympics Are Coming In 2024 Where Athletes Are Allowed To Dope Their Brains Out

MartinFredy. Getty Images.

Guardian -- An Olympic-styled competition for drug-taking athletes is being launched by an Australian entrepreneur.

Melbourne-born, London-based businessman, Aron D’Souza is the president of Enhanced Games, a coalition of athletes, doctors and scientists. He plans to stage the inaugural games of no drug testing in December next year, with two high-profile Australian athletes among those expressing interest.

…Five sports categories - track and field, swimming, weightlifting, gymnastics, and combat sports - will be on the program of the Enhanced Games, to be held annually.

There's a major difference between sports, and sports for entertainment. I can understand how someone who spent their entire life training to be the best at a specific sport could be a little perturbed about someone coming out of nowhere to beat their ass after spending the past 6 months pumping their body full of all the performance enhancing drugs in the world. You train for years, you do all the right things, you take care of your body, and all of a sudden some science experiment comes up and obliterates your hopes and dreams. 

Look, I get it. But at the same time…SHOW US THE FREAKS! 

This is a slippery slope, no doubt about it. But as long as we have a bunch of consenting adults making the decision to turn their bodies over to science and get pumped full of whatever drug is necessary to give them supernatural abilities? Well that's what the people want to see. You'll never be able to watch some normie crush a 3:46 mile ever again when you've got someone whose veins are glowing bright green and just ripped 4 laps around the track in a minute thirty. 

Sports are just always better when steroid use is rampant. You can morally object to it all you want, but that's simply a fact. Just look back on the glory days of the MLB. Nobody in a position of power wants to say it, but we all know it to be true. So now here comes some whacky Australian to be the necessary bad guy for us. He'll take the heat of starting the Enhanced Games, then 50 years from now we'll think back on how we ever watched athletes that weren't juiced out of their mind compete every 4 years on the world's biggest stage. 

Sidenote #1: Let's be honest with ourselves here. Everybody in the Olympics is already doping anyway. They just spend so much time and energy trying to figure out how to properly mask it so it doesn't pop up in blood tests. Now they can just skip all that nonsense. 

Sidenote #2: Life imitates art far more than art imitates life.