Barstool Sports Invitational | Wednesday, November 8 at Wintrust Arena in ChicagoTICKETS NOW AVAILABLE

The San Diego Padres Disaster 2023 Season Perfectly Summarized In Just One Xeet

I want to take a brief moment before the trade deadline goes bonkers to recognize the presently unbelievable futility of the 2023 San Diego Padres. 

If you embrace statistics, then you know the "clutch" factor is mostly overlooked. You're not good at winning 1-run games. You're (un)lucky to be outside a statistical range of outcomes over a broad sample size. 

To the statistics, you simply don't suck in extra innings. It's just bad timing. 

Another big one: RBI's don't matter. Runners in scoring position? Outside your control. Just another plate appearance, pal.

High leverage? It's the Big Leagues. Every inning is hard. The Padres being the worst in the final innings is merely coincidence. 


These are very common sentiments in the statistics crowd. They're backed by data and enthused by many. 

So can someone smarter than me explain why the Padres suck? Because this is very sucky. 0-10 in extra innings? Not great Bob.

6 wins in 24 one-run games?

Giphy Images.

This time last year was great to Padres fans. 

Juan Soto turns down a $450M extension, gets traded with a full season coming. Tatis returning from suspension. Momentum from the playoffs and an upgraded roster. Everything points up. 

I'm gonna show that tweet one more time: 

Ozzie Guillen could explain this much better than me. But I'm a firm believer in teams coming together and playing hard and well for each other. Just going hard every single pitch. Being into the game and truly giving a fuck about wins and losses more than your own personal results. That's much harder than you think because the nature of MLB is so self-focused. 

Most players are just worried about having a career and sticking in the big leagues long enough to get paid enough to change their life. That's the job. It's a privilege to be good enough to sincerely crave domination. 

The Padres are good enough, up and down the lineup, in and out the pitching staff to be that good. 

The crazy thing is I think they can still turn it around. I still think they can go on a run and rattle off like 20 of 25 and be a force in October. That's so stupid but they're just too good. I don't get it. 

The Stats tell you that it's just supremely bad luck, and ANY DAY now. Literally any day. They should be fine. 

Granted, it's August 1st and they've already played 107 games. But I'm holding out faith there's some kind of normalization coming because otherwise this is one of the most catastrophic, disastrous seasons of my life. If they don't sell then miss the playoffs? Holy Toledo. 

Talk about Bad Luck.

PS - Rich Hill made his MLB debut before some of you were in your dad's balls. That's crazy