Smokeshow Sofia Vergara Turns 51 Years Old Today And This Blog Has Nothing To Do With Hitting My Monthly Blog Quota

I'm actually not sure if I'm allowed to say this or not, but to give you a little peak behind the curtain at Barstool Sports, we have a blog quota now. Everyone's is different. I'm not entirely sure what it's based on, but in general, if you don't do a ton of video content, your blog quota is higher. Hence, my quota is higher. At least relatively speaking. I'm not going to say the number because it's honestly very fair, and for me to do anything that even remotely sounds like complaining about my job would be fucking insane. But I didn't do shit last week during our week off, so I'm a bit behind the 8-ball.

In entirely unrelated news, Sofia Vergara turned 51 years old today! In Spanish!

It would be a disaster of Chernobyl proportions if Barstool Sports did not recognize this momentous day with a blog consisting of multiple paragraphs, and a series of Instagram posts.

Phenomenal photography! For a woman to be so beautiful at the severely advanced age of 51 years old is nothing short of spectacular. 

From making us laugh in Modern Family from 2009-2020 as Gloria Delgado-Pritchett, to making us laugh in Hot Pursuit in 2015 as Daniella Rivera, to making us laugh in Chef in 2014 as Inez, to making us laugh in The Three Stooges in 2012 as Lydia, to making us laugh as the voice a Flamenca in The Emoji Movie in 2017, Sofia Vergara career has truly been incredible (IMBD)

There's really nothing the internet loves more than a beautiful woman over the age of 50. As I'm sure you've seen, Salma Hayek set the internet ablaze yesterday by merely swimming at the age of 56.

Martha Stewart, despite being a convicted felon, routinely goes mega-viral for simply existing at the age of 81 years old. Although, to be fair to the internet, to look like this at 80+ years old is genuinely insane.

Anyways, Happy 51st Cumpleanos Sofia Vergara. Here's to another 51 years of comedy and boners. And another [number redacted] more Pulitzer Prize worth blogs like this..