Lighten the Fuck Up! A Golfer Playing in Dublin Hooked His Drive & Plunked a Leprechaun...

Mat Hayward. Getty Images.

An older golfer playing in Dublin hooked his drive into the woods. While looking for his ball, he saw a Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head, and his golf ball beside him. 

Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy's head, reviving him. 

"Argh! What happened?" the confused Leprechaun asked… 

"I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball," the golfer replied. 

"Well, ye got ol' Wee Willy pretty good, but thanks for helping me. Now ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?" 

The golfer answered, "I don't want anything. I just thank the good Lord you're okay. And again, I truly apologize." Then he just walked off. 

"Wow, what a nice guy!" the Leprechaun thought to himself, "I'll have to do something nice for him… I'll give him three things… A great golf game, all the money he'd ever need, and a fantastic love life." 

A year passed, and the golfer was back playing on the course. On the very same hole, he hit a bad drive into the woods again, and Wee Willy was there waiting for him…

"'Twas me that made ye hit the ball here," the little guy revealed. "I just wanted to ask ye, how's yer golf game?" 

"My game is fantastic!" the golfer answered excitedly, "I'm an internationally famous golfer now!" And then he added, "By the way, it's good to see you're well and doing great." 

"Oh, I'm just fine now, thank ye. I'm the one who did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell me, how's yer money situation?" 

"Why, it's just wonderful!" the golfer said cheerfully. "When I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out $100 bills I didn't even know were there!" 

"I did that fer ye also. And tell me, how's yer love life?" 

The golfer blushed, turned his head embarrassed, and said shyly, "It's okay…" 

"C'mon now!" Wee Willy snapped, "I'm just wanting to know if I did a good job. How many times a week do ya do the deed?"

Blushing even more, the golfer looked around suspiciously and then whispered, "Once, sometimes twice a week…" 

"What?" responded the Leprechaun in shock. "That's all? Only once or twice a week?" 

"Well," the golfer replied, "I figure that's not too bad for a Catholic priest with a small parish…"                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968! This is LTFU Joke #178!

Just in case you missed the last one…