"Don't Bet Against The Fat Boy" - Serbian Thicc King Nikola Jokic, Serving As An Inspiration To All Of America
So much great Nikola Jokic content has come out since he helped the Denver Nuggets win their first NBA championship and earned Finals MVP in the process. The victory parade isn't until tomorrow, but all Joker wants to do is return home to Serbia and party with his close friends and family. He could not be less interested in all the pageantry and pretense of a hard-partying parade.
Hey, it's Denver, maybe Jokic can get hella baked, blast some Serbian tunes and get his groove on to make the time pass faster. Wouldn't recommend a heavy helping of alcohol if you're on the soonest flight back home. That's a long time in the air with a throbbing cranium.
Big Cat really got me with his "tattoo" line. And it got me to thinking: Nikola Jokic gives everyone hope that the American Dream is still alive. I know that term is more ire-inducing, annoying and frankly misappropriated and grossly oversimplified throughout history. Don't take this too seriously, for fuck's sake. But like...look at this man when he was a kid.
Talk about a baby-faced assassin. Move over, Steph Curry. This cherub-looking motherfucker (h/t 21 Jump Street) is the coldest, most calculated killer in the NBA. A former second-round pick who was drafted during a Taco Bell commercial, which will forever be one of the most hilarious things to happen in sports history. Like yeah, American Dream-type stuff right there. The layers are many.
Most importantly, Jokic's story inspires actual hope. Whereas someone like Steph has insane, limitless shooting range that no one can achieve even with all the practice in the world, we can maybe see ourselves ambling awkwardly up and down the court, with a 19" vertical, and dominating the sport like Jokic does if only we were seven feet tall and had that high of a basketball IQ.
Out of curiosity, in the aftermath of Jokic's remark to ESPN's Malika Andrews, I had to do a quick check on the dimensions of the average American man. It's a stocky frame of roughly 5-9, 198 pounds. According to the National Institutes of Heath's BMI calculator, the average American male is pushing obesity.
Not that this is a major shock revelation or anything, but for the average American dude, Nikola Jokic stands as a beacon of what's possible. Even since arriving in the NBA, Jokic has gotten noticeably more svelte. No, he doesn't look like the chiseled athletic marvel that is LeBron James or countless other pro basketballers. However, Jokic doesn't seem to tire, does his best to play every single night, and is in complete command of the game every night.
Indeed, do not bet against the fat boy. Because look what happens when a fat boy like Nikola Jokic punches back. This could apply to any sort of personal trait that'd get you made fun of or make you want to clam up and hide. Jokic gives zero fucks, isn't above self-deprecating humor, and has now asserted himself as arguably the best basketball player on the planet. Next step? Get him through this parade so he can get the hell home.
Twitter @MattFitz_gerald/TikTok