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The Celtics Season Is Essentially Over After The Miami Heat Kick The Ever Living Shit Out Of Boston To Take A Commanding 3-0 Lead

Megan Briggs. Getty Images.

What is there to even say? I'm not sure I'm totally positive about what I just watched. Well, that's not true. What we watched was the Boston Celtics enter Game 3 with their season on the line and get completely dick stomped. I mean a no doubt about it ass kicking in ways that I'm pretty sure are illegal in 27 states. There's bad, and then there was THAT.

We watched the Miami Heat look the Boston Celtics in the eye and laugh at them. They took a somewhat soft Celtics punch early on the chin and laughed. After the first 5 or so minutes, the Heat completely ripped the heart out of this team and this franchise. All series long they've been the tougher team. They've been the ones who imposed their will and played with force. The Celts have done nothing but play soft since this series started, and that's why their season is now effectively over. 

There's just no excuse for what we've seen. The Celts had health. They had the talent. But you know what? None of that shit matters when the talent refuses to show up. The Heat may not have All NBA guys, but they have guys who came to play. Meanwhile on the Celtics side, you get this from your best players

Jayson Tatum: 6-18 (1-7) with 3 TOs

Jaylen Brown: 6-17 (0-7) with 3 TOs

It starts and ends right there. In a game like this, with your season on the line, you need your best talent to show up on both ends for a full 48 minutes. That in NO WAY happened in this game. The thing is, they were not alone. You don't get down by 30+ because of two guys, this was a collective shitting the bed by the entire roster

Malcolm Brogdon: 0-6 (0-3)

Marcus Smart: 2-8 (0-3)

Derrick White: 3-9 (3-6)

We know guard play is important to the success of this team, so let me ask you how that guard production looks to you? Compare that to a nice little 29 points on 11-14 (6-9) from Gabe Vincent. Add in another 18 points on 7-11 (4-7) from Caleb Martin. So as you can see, having all that "talent" on paper doesn't mean jack shit when it doesn't produce. 

Defensively, this was as bad as an all around performance as we've seen all season. There was no perimeter resistance, Derrick White was getting crushed by either Butler or the guards, the Celts as a team couldn't stop giving up open looks and you know what happens when you do that to a confident team?

They go 19-35 from three.

In the biggest game of the season, the Celts got beat by Mazzulla Ball. The way MIA would drive and kick to open shooters is what this Celtics team used to do. They finished with 56/54% splits and 19 3PM with 26 AST and only 8 TOs. That's winning basketball.

The Celtics? A cool 39/24% with 23 AST and 15 TOs. That was obviously inflated by the garbage time minutes, so if you look at just the first 3 quarters, I mean what the hell is this?


How do you expect to win any sort of playoff game with that? I'd call it embarrassing, but that doesn't even do it nearly enough justice.

The way the Celtics played tonight, they deserved everything that happened. It started early with them losing their mental composure. They let calls and non calls impact their mindset and that bled into the defense. From there, they were never able to recover. You could then tell they started to press, which never works, and it didn't matter how many timeouts Joe took. Every single time the Celts kept shitting the bed. That is inexcusable. 

I wouldn't even say Joe was remotely good in this game either, but what difference does that make when the entire roster plays like a bunch of soft assholes? Let's tell it like it is. They had every opportunity to get back to the Finals and avenge last season, and they have completely choked. From top to bottom, star players to role players to the coach. It was a complete failure from everyone involved. You put up this type of performance with everything on the line?

Pathetic. Absolutely beyond pathetic.

This is not a case of the Celts threw this game or this series away. No, don't get that twisted. The Miami Heat completely owned them. From Game 1 to Game 3, that is the reality. The Heat have been the better team in every single way. Offense, defense, shooting, ball movement, toughness, focus, preparation, execution, you name it and the Heat were better. They deserve their 3-0 lead and then some. 

NBA history suggests Tuesday's Game 4 is all but a formality. We know the history, no team has ever won a series down 0-3. The way the Celts have looked in this series, they are certainly not playing a brand of basketball that suggests they'll be the first to ever do it.

A complete choke. Once this season is over, there is no talking like this wasn't a failure. Of fucking course it was. You were the 2 seed with homecourt advantage with a spot in the Finals on the line and you choked in a title or bust season. That is the very definition of failure.

We'll dive deeper in the morning. As painful as that will be.