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Welcome Back To Absolutely Crushing Baseballs, Bryce Harper

Rob Tringali. Getty Images.

Bryce Harper wasn't even supposed to return to baseball until after the All-Star Break. The fact that he came back from Tommy John surgery in just 160 days was otherworldly. Shit was unfathomable in recent human history. So when he came back on Tuesday night, it was only fair that people give Bryce a few weeks to make the necessary adjustments to return to the god-like status we all know and love him to be at. 

I mean he had just received major surgery less than 6 months ago. He didn't have any preseason. He needs to adjust to the pitch clock. It would be more than fair if it took Bryce Harper until June to find his swing. 

But yet again, Bryce Harper isn't human. 

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If you picked up season tickets in left center field this year, you probably thought you'd go months before you even had a chance to get your hands on a Bryce Bomb. But here we are in the first week of May, and Bryce Harper is back. And just when the city needed him the most. Goddamn the Sixers organization to hell. It's Phillies season, bitch. 

@JordieBarstool